Rosenrot oh Rosenrot...

Chapter 09

Flake put his head in his hands and I felt like a child, sitting there in front of him. Yes... I had done a horrible thing, or more like, I had let a very bad thing happen to me. I heard him let out a very low sigh as I looked at the ground that was covered with leaves and pine needles. It wasn't like we could have talked about it with the village near by... couldn't risk anyone hearing about Idolem and I...

"Well...?" I lightly pushed, waiting for a response. He again sighed, and sat on a rock by the river, as the only sounds we could hear were the birds chirping away in the distance, and the running water coming from right behind us.

"This isn't good, Father," he finally said, looking up at me with worried green eyes. I wanted to say something to dispute it, but I just looked down again.

"I know..." This time he put his head in his hands, running his hand through his hair. "I can't... I don't know what to do."

"Go home," he said quickly.

"What?"

"You need to go... somewhere else... you..." he stood and looked me right in the eyes, his small hands resting on my broad shoulders. "You can't stay here. Not with feelings like the ones you're describing."

"I can't go home..." I replied quietly. We both knew it was true. Either of us really could leave. If I left, I was to be banished from my home... and then I would have... nothing... "What about the pope...?"

He was quiet for a moment, but he looked at me in seriousness.

"You. Can't. Stay here, Till." We said nothing for a long time, instead, we just stared at each other, before I finally broke. Great, I couldn't stay here, but I couldn't go home. I nodded solemnly.

"You won't tell the others, will you?" Father Richard would definitely report me... and I can't imagine what Fathers Ollie and Christoph would do.

"Of course not," Flake said, with a hint of amusement in his voice, "There's not much to tell, now is there?"

No, no there was nothing to tell... yet...

**********

As I packed my bag in the little cabin I was staying in later that night, I couldn't help but hear a soft sobbing from outside my door. I stopped only for a moment and listened. Who at this hour would be awake enough to be crying...? And why did it sound so familiar...?

Quietly, I slipped the bag I was packing under the bed it was once resting on, so in case someone were to come in, they wouldn't know I was planning on leaving, grabbed the candle from my table, and made my way to the door.

For a moment, I stood in front of it, trying to make out exactly who it was, and it only took me about five seconds to come to a conclusion.

It was her.

I sighed deeply, and looked away, contemplating just leaving her out there... She never asked to be let in, did she? Whether I liked it or not, she was the source of my temptation, and she was the reason I was going to have to leave.

But...

But she was crying. There was a little girl, sitting outside my place of living... and she was crying. Even though I didn't want to admit it... I wanted to protect her... I always wanted her to smile with those remarkable curled lips, and I couldn't stand the thought of her amazingly prudent young brown eyes ever being red with sadness. I couldn't just... LEAVE her out there! Where were her parents at a time like this?! It wasn't up to me to make her happy and keep her safe!

But it was.

In a way... I knew if she asked... I would have given her everything.

After muttering a very ungodly word under my breath, I placed my hand on the door handle and sighed, looking up at one of the boards in the ceiling. A very big black spider crawled out of a crack, but I was going to let it live.

This was a mistake.

I opened the door, and sure enough, that little woman was standing right outside, her shaking fist raised, looking like she was about to knock as soon as I opened willingly. Hot drips of salt water ran from her brown eyes, and spilled down her now heavily blushed cheeks. Her chest heaved twice before she threw her fist away and collapsed into my arms without warning, crying so hard against me I could feel her whole body tremble.

"Shhh," I hushed her, holding her firmly against me and gently stroking her hair. "Shhh, my child. You're safe now. You're safe." And as I kissed the top of her head, I looked across the way to another cabin, where I saw the curtains rustle and a light change position.

This was surely a mistake.

Men shouldn't be allowed to love.

**********

"They beat me," she said quietly, sitting at my table with the only blanket I owned around her shoulders, and my last chamomile tea bag brewing away in the cup I placed in her hand. It took her a while to calm down enough to be able to speak, so I just sat there quietly, across the table as she held onto my hand as hard as she could probably grip it.

And I couldn't help but notice dark purple bruises painted up her arms, and what seemed like a whip mark on the side of her neck.

"They think it's funny..." she went on, as I became more and more angry. "My father... he beats me for no reason... sometimes with his belt... other times with the whips we only use for the horses... and sometimes... he doesn't use anything at all... just his fists... and my mother... she likes to watch... and laugh... especially when I bleed..." I stared blankly at her as she told me this, my jaw getting surprisingly tight, and my grip becoming harder on her hand that gripped mine back.

Why would God let such an innocent thing like Idolem be beaten like that... with instruments for horses?! No one should have been allowed to touch her. Not her mother, not her father. No one. No one should have EVER been allowed by the heavens themselves to hurt a woman as pure as Idolem. Not my Idolem. Never.

I would have a word with them soon. I would have a FIST with them, God's will be done! But I needed to keep my head. For now, I needed to keep her safe. That was my number one priority.

She began to cry again, as she set the cup back on the table and looked away quickly.

"Father Till... please..." she began, holding back tears that just ran anyway, "Please... don't... don't make me go back there... please don't make me go back... I can't... I can't take it anymore... I don't want to go back..."

I stood and quickly came to her side of the table, where I crouched down and hugged her around her shoulders. She continued weep, with her face firmly positioned in the crook of my shoulder. I never wanted to let her out of my sight... always wanted to make sure she would be taken care of and loved. It didn't seem like she was getting much of that as it was.

"Father..." she started as she pushed me just a little bit away from her, just enough so I could see her face looking back at me. "Please don't make me go back there... I want to stay with you..."

I didn't even need to think about it. I would have felt better if she stayed with me anyway.

I lightly brushed her cheek with my pointer finger and smiled at her.

"I won't make you go, my child."

I want you to stay with me, my love.

"Oh Father!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around my neck and crying now what seemed like tears of happiness. "Thank you Father! Thank you!" I smiled against her hair that draped over my face and allowed my arms to wrap around her.

"You'll be safe now Idolem," I whispered to her, "I'll never let anything hurt you... my Idolem..."

I decided I was going to stop asking God for forgiveness for falling in love.