It all started March, I "broke up" with a guy named Louise because the only reason he liked me was because of looks even if I didn't really look pretty. He didn't care about attitude at all, I know, shallow right? So She started liking another guy his name was Adrian. He was sweet, kind, and very passionate about music, although he liked another girl her name is Cassidy, she's My best friend more like sister actually. I was okay with that as long as he was happy I would be happy but one day, on July 15; day of NAT he messaged me, he told me he was in love with me. I was happy of course, everything was great. It was all going well, we would talk every night, he would message me sweet things and same thing with me until one day Lexi, one of my best friends told me he stopped, I went home and he messaged me telling me he did stop, I felt broken and sad but either way I still did love him. On that same day he messaged me saying he was sorry and that he felt like Sh** without me. I didn't know what to do, I still did love him, no more, no less I still did but if I did give him another chance he might break me again. At that point I was confused but Carry helped me and told me to just give him a second chance and so I did. Everything was falling back into place, I was happy actually beyond happy. He would remind me everyday that I was beautiful, tell me I was the greatest thing that ever happened to him until a week passed and then he told me he stopped again and I felt broken, stupid, and idiotic for giving him another chance. At that point I still loved him, no more, no less I still did, my love was unconditional. Yeah, I know stupid right? The next day he told me that the only reason he stopped was because he thought he wasn't perfect enough for me and so I forgave him. He was happy, I was happy everything was great, we would sweet talk, say good morning and goodnight and he would tell me that he would NEVER stop loving me. A week passed and I asked him "do you think that you'll ever get bored of me, or lose interest in me?" He said "no" at first, I didn't reply and then after a few minutes he said " ok, TBH a little" I shed a tear but I was still smiling and inside I was dying. The next day I asked "Do you still like me?" He replied "no" at that point I was lying on my bed knowing he never meant a goddamn word he said. I felt like an idiot, I still loved him but I knew it was over so I was trying to move on. A week and 4 days passed and I was half way to moving on until I got a message 2:30 AM in the morning he said he still loved me. I was confused AF. He would spam me with love quotes but I just seen zoned...he keeps telling me he loves me but all I really wanted at that point was a "sorry" I didn't know if I should forgive him, I was quite sure he would break me again, but truth is you never really know. If I forgave him he might just break me again to the point where there's nothing left to break. That's the problem with me, I always get too attached. If I detect a slight change in the tone of your voice, I'll be wondering all day what went wrong. Truth is I'm a sucker for love, ill fall for you over and over again even if u keep breaking me I still will and no matter how smart the things my brain would tell me I'll always be an idiot and listen to my heart.
