Blue (One Direction)

13. Painfull pasts

Sky's POV:

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*Dream*

I see something.... It's a child.

It looks like me when I was young..... When I was happy.

Then that all changed, my happiness was taken away from me, just like everything and everyone.

The little girl... The younger me she was smiling being happy to be on this planet, to be happy she's alive.

She lived with her oh so loving parents, at least they were loving and caring at the time I mean when I was a child and needed help in this hell hole we call life but I didn't know any better I was just doing what my mother told me to do, she told me to be who you really are well tuff luck because she made me into something I'm not.

The mother in the dream was not the 'mother' I would say she was today, if you can still call her a mom but no I listened to what she said to the little girl.

"You don't need to hang around with boys, you got all these dresses, dolls and pink shoes at the house so why would you want to hang out with dirty old boys"

She made her, I mean me... The younger me I guess into thinking hanging out with boys was wrong, trying to make me a girly girl

"But I like being with the boys mama, they treat me nicely and let me play cars and tag with them plus playing with the mud mama, it's so fun"

Let's just say 'mama' wasn't to please with what I had said but I can't take it back now, not that I would want to because I'm perfectly fine with the way I act now

"No, no daughter of mine is going around with boys" the mother lifted her back hand, than brought it down, slapping my chubby face, leaving a big red hand mark on my left cheek.

I never saw my mother the same loving way, ever sense that moment I disliked her more and more but at that age, I was only 6, I became a lost hope to my family.

My mother and father changed my entire life by forcing me to do what they wanted me to do, by yelling at me for no reason at all, not talking to me for days pretending like I wasn't even there, I had started to become skinny from lack of being fed.

The girl I'm looking at is still the same little six year old but she's nothing but bone, in the corner of a dark alleyway looking abandoned, lost and scared, my parents kicked me out of the house for a while, who am I kidding more like months or even years but no it had only been a few weeks that I was out on the street.

There are men walking up the littler me, there..... Oh my god there going to rape me... All over again, my frail little body started to shiver and squirm to get away but I was no use, there were three men and only one me, one little me

"Aaaahhhhhhhh" my scared, small but high pitched voice a screamed in agony

"Noooo" I scream back "stop that" again and again but they keep going, taking turns, using me like a rag.

(Sorry if this is a bit confusing, you can just ask questions if you would like)

"Noooooo" I scream one more time, realizing that I'm back in my room, not the room that's at Liam's house but my old room I had when I was thirteen, there I was sitting at the edge of my bed and I remember the only time I sat on the edge of the bed was to cause myself pain, more pain then I already was in but the pain of the razor digging in my skin was the only thing making me sane.

I was a very psychotic teenager I guess you can say, where I always laugh at pain, my parents had caused me to go crazy, thinking cutting myself would make the emptiness go away for good but no the only thing that's there for good was scars and lots of them.

I watch myself dig the dreaded razor into my thigh, dragging it along my skin over and over and over, it's like on repeat, making me feel worse and worse about myself.

The blood running down my legs and arms.

Why am I experiencing this all over again?

*dream over*

My heart is beating fast, my hands go straight to my scars, running my fingers over them, bringing back the worst of memory's.

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So there you have it, a look into her pain filled past and that's not all she's keeping from Liam, he knows nothing about her past other than her disliking her parents for reasons she has yet to tell him.

Sooo I updated finally yayyy :3 but really if you have ANY questions about this chapter or book just let me know, short I know but it's something and sorry if you don't like cutting but it had to happen