One day in winter, I saw a track of yellow snow and I followed it. It lead me to a dog.
The dog gave me an acknowledging nod and said, "That trail there isn't pee. It's actually eggnog. Want some?" he offered, holding out a cup of eggnog in my direction.
And I said, "Yeah, man! I want some of that eggnog!" and I slipped on the ice, falling unconscious. I was out for 56,000 hours. I saw the dog looking at me, the same cup of eggnog in his extended hand.
I said, "Honestly, what is going on here? This is the weirdest thing I have ever experienced in my entire life. Who even are you, and why can you talk?" to the dog.
"I'm Batman," he replied. And then he turned into a costume-wearing-dog-batman.
"Is this a dream? I really hope it's a dream. You see, this is the world that goes on in the mind of my younger cousin. In fact, the bolded parts of this story are written by him. And his stories always involve dogs! Begone, foul beast," I said, poofing him away with my magic wand. I was then left alone with the wonderful eggnog.
And I drank it. I made slurp effects.
The end.
***
My stories are always about dogs because I have SWAG.
Please don't use that word, you sound like a loser.
no.
yes.
no.
no. I mean, yes!
Now we sound stupid.
yes.
Chicka chicka chicka chickaaaaa!
No.
