have you ever walked outside in the rain? I don't mean tiny raindrops that feel like sweet kisses as they trail down your cheek. I mean long, hard, powerful rays of water that you can physically feel. the types that makes you want to stay in bed, inside a puddle of blankets drinking hot chocolate while watching the thunder through your window. yet again it can also make you want to go outside, no umbrella, no rain boots, nothing, just clothes that will soon cling onto your body like a second skin, and just feel like screaming, like crying, you feel like you're b r e a k i n g d o w n, and the worse part? there is nothing that can stop it. you just break down and cry and cry and cry again because every single negative emotion possible is hitting you all at once and then, nothing. you feel empty, you feel lost, not sad, not happy, just dull, and nothing even matters anymore. but, it can also make you feel good, very, very good. have you ever kissed someone in the rain? the both of you, fully clothed yet feeling so naked, under the pouring rain, just the both of you, so close, as if you were melding into one person, just two souls in love with the same hearts. and, to others, us, loners. have you ever walked in a forest while the rain is pouring, running in the woods, dodging trees and branches every step you go. laughing, feeling free of everything, or crying, just in need of somewhere to breakdown, in need of physical contact from a specific person, yet you can't, and at that moment, feeling empty, incomplete without them. thinking it'll be okay, it'll be fine, saying that if you think it real hard, it'll happen, when really you're just trying to convince yourself you'll be fine. but will you? will you really?
i guess some questions are better left unanswered.
thea
sorry for the long wait
