When Kei was a little girl she dealt with a lot of things in her life time, she always had to deal with seeing her mother get beaten. She has seen a person get shot before so she’s terrified of guns anything that sounds like a gun will scare her and make her cry remembering all that happened, she didn’t have many friends in school she was always picked on by popular girls and boys. One girl use to go around spreading rumors about her being a “Slut,” and telling everyone she did “Witch Craft,” all of her classmates were scared of her; Kei’s whole 9th grade year was ruined, but Kei almost got herself in real big trouble, one day she missed school and the next day she was talking to a so called “Friend,” this so called friend thought it would be fun to play with Kei’s mind. So the so called “friend,” told Kei that the teacher was looking down her shirt and Kei believed it so much she went to the principal and told her what was going on. Kei then learned that this so called “friend,” was planning to get her in trouble she truly thought the girl was her friend, but Kei couldn’t take it anymore she didn’t want to lie and make the teacher lose his job, she decided that she wouldn’t be friends with someone like the evil girl that was one of the shadows she was dealing with. Kei never ever meant to get the man in trouble at all but that same day he was going to get in trouble for a lie; she busted into tears screaming “I can’t lie anymore I wasn’t even here when this happened, I’m so sorry,” Kei then realize that trying to stay friends with someone like that wasn’t worth it at all hanging out with the wrong crowd can truly get you in trouble.
Kei wrote the teacher a letter saying sorry to his friends and family that she never meant any of that to happened she just wanted the girl who blacked mailed her to like her, but she also learned that the truth will set you free even if you do get in trouble telling the truth makes you feel better, rest of Kei’s 9th grade year she was dealing with even bigger shadows she was so caught up into a show that she forgot who she was almost she wanted every game, every doll, and everything that was about that show. She would then see demons that would say things to her like “you’re not going to live to see another day,” “ you don’t deserve to live,” she would always have these break downs in class she would stay away from people because of it no one would understand because of it she had to go to a rehab for it she never wanted that to ever happen but now she knows every show is not good for kids to watch cause sometimes it brings the into a world where they believe that they are this character and its real. But when she told someone they would laugh. Kei also had a gift she didn’t understand she could see guardian angels even hers she could also talk to them; she then learned it was a gift she helped people with it. Kei had problems in the virtual world to she had a person hate her for some reason she doesn’t understand why he’s being so immature that happened two years ago and she learned that people are not always who they say they are everyone online is not always trust worthy they always talk about you behind you back.
But in real life she had a real problem to deal with even more then that her best friend and crush died he was everything to her, his name was Chance he was a very sweet guy, he always made her laugh and her heart race every time he showed up. Kei couldn’t believe it she was just sitting in her room when she got that call it was the summer and she was reading in her room; then her phone rang it was one of her friends calling her to tell her that Chance had died, that summer Kei broke down when he was gone all of her friends knew how she felt about Chance even Chance himself knew. But he felt he had no one who cared for him so he over dosed. Kei’s 1oth grade year she wasn’t really making it she was stressing most of the time so it affected her grades.
11th grade got better she was learning how to stand up for herself a bit and she learned how to say no to people; she had real troubles with boys she had boyfriends but they were either ashamed to be with her or just wanted sex and Kei wasn’t that kind of girl she wants to wait til’ she’s married to have sex all the little nasty girls would make fun of her cause she never had sex but she didn’t care she would rather wait then to have a baby while she was in school. Shoo condoms can bust to no matter what brand they are, she then gave up one boy’s for then on out she was very insecure when a boy who actually liked her called her beautiful or pretty.
Her virtual relationships were good and okay but she really loved one of her relationships online she was with a guy she called Mira-kins she kind of wished she had never broke up with him, but there were stories of him cheating and stuff so she left it alone; also learned that online people are not trust worthy either they can say they are your friends but they could be talking about you behind your back I’m not saying all of them are that way but some are. In 12th grade Kei’s grades were the boom! She was on the A and B honor roll and in FBLA(Future Business Leaders of America) but it was heart breaking during that year she lost her beloved teacher Mr. Bailey and she lost her beloved Father they both meant the world to her. Her prom was the magical to her it was like her very own Cinderella story it was the best night of her life, then when graduation day came she couldn’t believe it at all she finally made it she is somebody that day she looked up to the sky and smiled with tears in her eyes saying “daddy I made it,” she was so proud of herself.
But after that she learned that she can’t count coins right like normal people cause she is mildly retarded and people make jokes about it she believes she’s a freak and she can’t really make real friends cause people always make her feel that way she’s annoying, she’s a freak, she’s stupid. She’s so different I hate her I could never love someone like her at all and she will never ever find anyone to love her at all that’s all I ever heard every day of my life and I’m just tired of people lying to me I said my apologize to everybody I have ever loved sure I screwed up big time with people but that doesn’t mean you have to treat me like dirt and kick me around and make fun of me I just want to be normal like everybody else but I can’t be like you said.
This is a true story and writing this all down for the whole world to see has made me feel better I don’t give a damn if you make fun of me anymore talk about me all you want cause it only shows that you’re a coward and you always going to make someone other then you feel bad about themselves I have been fighting these shadows all my life and it freaking bothers me to see people going through the same thing I’m going through. But I know one true online friend I can trust his name is Kit-chan and he’s means every thing to me he’s my world he feels like killing himself because of kids at school but I won’t let him ever do that ‘cause if he does I don’t know what I do he’s like the son I never had that’s my baby when I felt like taking my life he was always there 4 years we have be the best of friends. And we have always told each other everything I can never keep a secret from Kit we have had our fair share of arguments but we always know how to work it out and that’s what being a true friend and a best friend all is about. I love you Kit-chan always and I’ll always be here for you til death do us apart.
Hurt
You can hurt me
But how will that make you feel
I have been hurt by people like you all my life
All you care about is yourself
We all bitch about stuff but it hurts
For a friend not to understand what you’re going through
I never wanted to hurt any of my friends and I never wanted to be
Hurt by them either I love them forever even if they did hurt me I still love them
The way I did back then
I don’t care if you hurt me I’ll still love you
I could never hate you if you had hurt me I still love you no matter what
That’s what I said right I kept my promise even if you did break my heart
Or made me cry it doesn’t matter to me because I still love you
Story and Poem by: Keiarra Chanelle McCoy A.K.A Miyuki
Stop and take a look in the mirror for a moment because your not perfect either so quit make people feel so bad when you don’t even know they’re story they may not know how to get your attention, because they never learned how grow up and be a friend
