In Search of Love

CHAPTER ONE

Jackie walked mechanically to the door of her apartment, the usual spring and life in her gait was gone. She was demoralized, broken in heart, soul and spirit. It was another of those blue days that broke with promises of fulfillment and happiness but ended in gloom, doom and depression.

As soon as she stepped into her room that evening, she flung her black Lois Vuitton designer handbag aside, flung her apartment keys across the tiled floor and crumpled in a heap; sobbing her already reddened eyes out.

Jackie was beautiful, voluptuous, curvy and on the side of fair complexion. She had a good job; working with a bank at the heart of the city of Abuja and had a car of her own; she was by all means and classifications a trendy and classy lady. Well polished, well educated, well traveled and successful at her career.

Yet she lacked one thing; a man to call husband. One who was supposed to love her and appreciate her, virtues and flaws, the good and the bad. Jackie was desperate in her need for true love in her life, but that had consistently eluded her.
As she sobbed, her body racked with the spasm from her sobs; tears silently snaking its course on both of her cheeks.

Wave upon wave of nostalgia rolled over her heart and crashed into sharp rough-edged pieces that pierced her heart the more. As each wave built up within her, her sobs increased and she felt like the whole of her world had come crashing around her; once again.

She remembered the precious moments she had shared together with Richard, those occasions they had cuddled together whispering sweet nothings and everything into each other's ears, the nights they slept entwined in each others limbs, those moments they had stared into each other's eyes and it seemed they could see all the way right down into each others souls.

When would all these ever stop? At thirty two years of age, it seemed to her that her mates were all married, it appeared hers would always remain a mirage. All she had to do was open her facebook page and the faces of her friends stared back at her; in wedding gowns, traditional wedding attires, with their husbands in tight embraces, smiling, . . .taunting.

Jackie let out a sigh amid her sobs. These were the secret tears she had to cry, and she always shed them. But today's tears seemed to be the mother of them all.

Out there was usually another world for her, every other day.

Each morning she dresses up and drives down to her place of work at the bank; all smiles and charisma, she would see naked envy in the eyes of most ladies she comes across.

They wouldn't know the battles she had to fight in her life. The pain that tugs at her heart, the perpetual wrath in the heart of the hopeless spinster, and one whose heart had been perpetually and consistently broken. At times she wondered if there was any bit of her heart remaining, going by the series of emotional pummeling it had received over the years.

And once more it had boiled down to this again; another heart break. It seems heartbreak had become synonymous with the her life.

Heartbreak.

Jackie met Richard on facebook at a time she was just pulling through from a broken relationship with Sam that still hurt at that time.
She always liked to have fun and unwind at her spare time by visiting posts and comments on her wall or on any of the pages she had subscribed to; and there were quite a handful of them. She would read the hilarious comments and more hilarious responses and comments from fellow subscribers.

On that particular day, she had scrolled through her fairly new samsung android phone, one of the gifts she had received on her last birthday.
It had been given to her by Sam.

She had found a post on the Relationship and Marriage page, it had been an interesting topic.
Jackie had been intrigued by a particular intelligent comment and had replied to the comment. In a few minutes Richard had added her to his list of friends on facebook, and by the next day they were chatting on the facebook messenger. It was like they had known themselves for a long time as it appeared to them that they had similar interests and were both recovering from broken relationships.

So it had seemed.

The only thing that sort of kept them physically apart was the distance. Jackie happened to be residing in Abuja while Richard was in Port Harcourt; a distance of about seven hundred kilometers. Yet they had maintained the communication, called each other on phone as many times as they possibly could each day.

To Jackie, it seemed like she had finally found the one. The one to be her knight in an ever shining armour.

She liked Richard from the pictures of him that she had seen on facebook. He was handsome; the sort of dude that would walk into a place and time would stand still.

That sort of a guy that would smile at you and at a public function and your legs would turn to jelly. That was the kind of beauty, physique and charisma that Richard carried.

And he sounded like one who was God-fearing also.

Jackie was from a religious background, and she knew that having been raised in the faith, she ought not end up with a man that was not a believer.
Yes, she had been born again. In fact she had lost count of the number of times she had surrendered her life to God in the church for a higher purpose and a higher calling.

Somehow, she had always ended up back sliding again. Right now she had given up on that, she just needed to work her way into a promising and worthy relationship that she would be sure would lead to marriage, and then she would get back to the church and become fully involved once again.

Richard walked into her life at the time when the turbulence in her relationship with Samuel was at its peak, and she was already considering breaking up with Samuel. But somehow she had held on, just for the succor that the mere mention of the phrase 'in a relationship' would bring her.

So she had held on, but she already knew the relationship was dead, and grieved in her heart.

That was when Richard had appeared.

A 'savior' of some sort, and even more handsome than samuel.
And now that it's obvious that they had come to the end of their tummy-fluttering love affair, she suddenly found herself on an emotional ground zero, coming back to square one; again!
Jackie had lost track of time as she cried her pain out, slumped over and crumpled in a heap.

She completely ignored the persistent ringing of her mobile 'phone.

She had no energy nor the desire to speak with anyone right now.

She did not know when she slept off, weakened by the exertion from her cries. By the time she opened her eyes, she could tell by the disturbing quiet that it was a long way into the night.

Slowly, reluctantly, she stirred and got on her feet.

It was 12:35am by her clock, but she did not care. As she waddled unsteadily to her unmade bed, she managed to remove her jacket which she wore over her spaghetti top, and flung it to a corner of the room.

The last thing to care about at that time was where it would fall.

With a deft move of her fingers, she swiftly unhooked her bra, slid the straps off her shoulders and from the side of her top she pulled it off and flung it to the opposite direction.
With her half closed in a sleep of exhaustion, she pulled off her briefs and threw them at the foot of her bed.

Freed from all unnecessary fabric restrictions, she threw herself onto her bed with a dull thud, and within moments she was deep in sleep.

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