Malec/Jalec/Malace Smut

My Poor Broken Shadowhunter

"Stupid, stupid, Nephilim." The words were murmured quietly into the darkness of their bedroom.

Jace hid his face against Magnus' neck, taking in a shaky breath. There was no bite in those words. There was nothing but affection and exasperation as arms wrapped around Jace's body. Never had anyone treated him so gently and with so much love. It was too much, and to think this had all started because Magnus had told him he was beautiful.

*

It wasn't as if Jace hadn't been told he was attractive. That wasn't the case. He'd been called handsome just as many times as he'd been called arrogant. No, it was the word 'beautiful' that had caught him off guard. Magnus and him were settling down for the night and Magnus had simply told him, while stroking delicate fingers over his jaw, that he was beautiful. Jace had been left speechless as Magnus clicked his fingers and the lights turned off. Magnus' hands and his voice had been so soft but they'd hit him hard. The word burrowed deep under his skin and struck a chord right at the core of his very being. It was almost painful, his chest tightening around a trembling breath.

How could a creature, as gorgeous and powerful as Magnus, call him beautiful? Jace wasn't blind. He knew he was good looking and he took great pride in his physique, but beautiful had never been a word he had applied to himself. No one had applied that word to him. It was such a shock to hear that he'd gone tense, unable to really figure out how to respond correctly. Magnus had noticed the shift and instantly asked him what was wrong. Even through the darkness, the glow close to his face told him that Magnus' eyes were open and his glamour had slipped.

In their room there had never been any judgment. Jace was allowed to be stripped back to his true self, painfully open for Magnus to see. Feeling vulnerable yet safe had been openly encouraged by the both of them. So, when Magnus asked him if he was okay in a voice as smooth and soothing as the cool satin sheets pulled over his body, Jace had made the smallest noise at the back of his throat. That noise had been followed by a small'''m not...' that had Magnus pulling him close.

"Stupid, stupid, Nephilim." The words were murmured quietly into the darkness of their bedroom.

A soft hand, buzzing with barely contained power, ran through Jace's hair. It always astounded Jace; the way Magnus was so soft yet the magic coursing through his veins electrified his touch. Sometimes it bordered on a tickling sensation, while other times it was dangerously close to being slightly painful. Though, on occasions such as this, the magic was as careful and caring as Magnus himself. Jace couldn't, and would never, understand how Magnus had managed to stay so kind and so loving and so good after all he'd seen and the pure power he had itching to be released. Jace knew he wouldn't have been able to cope.

"My poor, broken, little Shadowhunter." The words made Jace's chest impossibly tighter, breathing becoming almost impossible. Each new description of himself was getting oddly sweeter. Stupid Nephilim to broken and little. Jace knew that the next description would be something adoring. He knew but he wasn't ready. The praise was always too overwhelming, no matter how many times they did this.

"So sweet. So kind and selfless. Such a good, beautiful angel."

Heat settled in, spreading through his whole body. It was the same burning in his cheeks that came from humiliation. It was the same sort of burning that accompanied harsh, objectifying words after or during a quick fuck with a complete stranger. The only difference was it was hitting Jace in a completely different way. It was humiliation making his skin flush but this humiliation came from being unable to believe the words spoken so truthfully into his ear. It was humiliation that was far more complex than simply being made to feel like an object of someone else's satisfaction.