-Youth-

•Seven•

Billie's POV
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"What'd you get for lunch?" I ask Esme, watching her sit across from me.

"Just some little snacks I guess". She says, staring down at her plate. I drop my fork, raising an eyebrow.

"You're not fat". I say, keeping a straight face that I rarely have. She looks up at me, confused. "I know that's what you think and it's stupid so don't think it". I would've said so much more but I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

"I used to think that, so I started eating less. You don't understand, Billie, whenever I try to eat more I just throw it up". I sigh.

"I didn't know". I don't pick up my fork again. I'm not hungry anymore.

Esme's POV
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I rush to the bathroom and throw the door open, the couple making out by the sink leaves and I look around the stalls to see if anyone else is here. No one. I take a step towards the mirror, staring at my reflection. My bangs are covering half my face like they always do, I move them aside, tucking them behind my ear. I smile shyly at myself, knowing deep down Billie thinks I'm pretty. She stares at me all the time, that's the only explanation I can think of.

I'm ok, I guess. I guess... I hate my eyes, always have, always will. They're just so boring and... brown, like shit. People like cool eyes, blue eyes like Billie's or a mix of different colours. Boy I wish I had heterochromia. I think the only things I like about me are my boobs, first of all, no judging but they're a bit bigger than other girl's and I don't know, they're nice. I like my skin only because I haven't broke out yet like every other kid in highschool. And my mom says I have her lips, which are really nice. They're not too big and not too small. But my horrid teeth ruin the whole image. There's a huge gap between them that I've always hated that I was cursed with. People tell me that any boy will love me unconditionally and won't care about it, but I do.

I think it's horrible, and if I had the money, I'd buy braces. I step back a little and lift up my shirt, standing sideways and looking in the mirror. I did this to myself and I hate it, but it's irreversible. The door opens and I quickly throw my shirt back down, fixing my hair in the mirror.

Wait a minute, I know that girl. That's Myles' girlfriend. I smile awkwardly and leave.

Short chapter, but a little filler just to explain to all of you reading this that even if you think you're the ugliest person on earth, you're definitely not. I've learned in the past year to accept myself the way I am and not look in the mirror with a sour face. Sure, I'm not amazing and beautiful, sure a lot of people mistake me for a boy sometimes XD but that's ok, because I am still beautiful in a really weird way. Imperfections are beautiful, that's how you know someone is real and human and truly amazing, and the best way to be beautiful is to be confident, take confidence in your body and don't think about what anyone else thinks, because chances are, when you think everybody is staring at you, they're not. And if they are, then you have proof that you're gorgeous. Another point, I've liked guys and thought they were so beautiful and incredible and when I told other girls, they thought I was insane. This goes for both boys and girls of course, if someone loves you they don't correct your body or face, they don't hate your imperfections, they embrace them, they love them and they love you. I can look in the mirror sometimes and smile and know that I am ok. You should be able too also. I know a girl at my school who thinks she's ugly, but I can't stop looking at her because I think she's so beautiful, and I'll never stop telling her because she needs to believe me.

Some things that you hate about yourself, people love. And when they tell you, you start loving them too. I don't know the faces reading this (acc I know one of them lol) but I guarantee that some days you look in the mirror and you scoff or just shake your head and walk away, but maybe just take some time one day to point out some things you like, just to fuel you for that day or for a certain amount of time. And no, it's not conceited or bitchy in any way to be proud of yourself, it's healthy and I think it should happen more, that's why I wrote this chapter <3