Whisper

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

140 hours remaining

(Cilan's POV)

I glared at my brother in silence as he stood, sliding his bound hands with him up the column.

It took me one large stride to clear the space between us. I pointed my finger in his face and growled, "Why were you on this mountain? You're a little ways from home, don't you think?"

Chili hung his head and gulped. "I came hoping to find at least your remnants..."

"WHY!? So you could torture my body still?!"

Chili winced and opened his mouth but I stopped him.

"Shut up, I don't even want to hear your voice! Do you know how many times I'd thought of suicide, or dreamed of death because of you!? The only time I was ever happy was when I RAN AWAY! You have no idea how horrid you made my life!" Tears pricked the corners of my eyes. "IT'S NOT MY FAULT MOM AND DAD LOVED ME MORE! IT'S NOT MY-, " My voice cracked and wavered. "fault...It's not..." I swiped away my tears and cleared my throat, with much difficulty. "I don't understand why you did it, but I will always remember what you did to me." Chili had had his head bowed while I was yelling. He didn't move. I turned around and made for the exit tunnel.

"Wait, Cilan I-" I held up my hand and continued walking. "I don't want to hear it."

"Cila-" He tried again. I turned sharply and yelled, "NO!" then turned on my heel and continued.

"We-""Shut up!" "Cilan, listen to-""SHUT UP!"

"CILAN, WE LOST THE RESTURANT!" Chili screamed at me.

I froze in utter shock. Having my attention, Chili continued.

"Mom and Dad were devastated after you were pronounced dead. They stopped funding us and with you gone and Cress in the hospital it was all put on my shoulders. The restaurant was losing money. I wasn't enough. Even when Cress came back it still wasn't enough. We were slowly going bankrupt. We were foreclosed two years ago...since then I left the family, hopping from job to job, trying to support myself..."

"During this time I was always thinking about you..." I turned around to find tears streaming down my brothers face. "I'll admit that I used to think about you and immediately feel hate. But those two years opened my eyes to how stupid I was and how horribly I had treated you..."

Chili looked me in the eye. "I became fed up with my life, past, and present. I was willing to die. I lost my apartment, my girlfriend, what family I had...my baby brother...I was ready, I had a plan...but I realized that I needed to do one more thing. I needed to ask for forgiveness. I came here to find something of you at least. I intended to beg for your forgiveness, even if you were dead. And then I intended to part myself from this world whether you forgave me me or not."

Chili fell to his knees and slumped forward, looking at the ground. "I-...I'm sorry Cilan...I know that sorry doesn't even cover what I've done to you, but...it's all I have to give you..."

I stared, amazed, at my brother. Part of my wanted so badly to forgive him. After everything he's been through he deserved it, and I wanted so desperately to have a brother that wouldn't hurt me.

I took a small step toward him.

The part of me that kept my family safe told me to be cautious. This may be a trick, no matter how bad I wanted him to be telling the truth. I needed to keep my distance.

I listened to the latter part of me. I walked out of the room.