My Lost Hero (Angels of War Series #1) REWRITING 2024

Chapter Twenty-three

House hunting was something else. A task I'd forgotten caused so much anxiety and second-guessing. I was lucky when I first took the job at Laith's Library as my parents would help with travelling arrangements to and from work until I met Megan and she saw my struggle and asked if I wanted to move in with her at the flat in Cleethorpes.

I didn't have to think about much as I had her for backup in helping to organise our bills and expenses budget, but now I was going into this alone and it all felt so scary.

The houses I had previously viewed weren't my cup of tea. They needed a lot of extra work and for the price the seller was asking; it meant it would strap my budget for additional renovations. I wanted a new build, but thought I would give the older houses a chance first. Fairview Estate seemed perfect for me. The houses immaculately built, with cream stone and grey slate roofing, every front door a different colour. It gave it a modest vibe. The gardens were small but had just enough space to live comfortably. I could more than see myself living here.

"I'll let you take another look around." Beatrice, the estate agent, said turning to leave me alone.

I jumped in, surprised by my enthusiasm. "There's no need. I'll take it."

"You will?" She grinned. "Well, great! I knew you'd see a home here."

My heart was pounding in my chest as I realised moving here could actually happen. "It's so me. I feel like I belong here already. Is that normal?"

"Yes, especially when you've found the right house. If you give me a moment, I'll ring back in the office to tell them to get the ball rolling."

"Oh, Lord. This is happening."

Beatrice laughed, writing something on her clipboard. "I won't be a second. You should start planning your wallpaper designs."

I glanced around the room, already imagining the couch sitting along the wall and the tall lamp that would give the right amount of light in the corner. I imagined filling one wall with photographs in cute frames to remind me of the happy times and the Aztec rug that could sit in the middle of the room.

Giddiness hit me, and I forced it to stay there, not knowing how long it would last. Two more weeks had passed, and I felt no better. In fact, my emotional state took a nosedive whenever I thought too hard.

Loneliness.

That was what got to me the most, and it was soul destroying. Distraction only worked for so long before I found myself walking into Megan's empty bedroom or going through the things Joshua left behind, hoping it would somehow bring him back to me.

I was stupid. It wouldn't, because he had made no effort to contact me, ignoring the few messages I sent when the heartache became overwhelming.

"Tabitha?" Beatrice poked her head around the door. "The paperwork is ready for you at the office. Are you set to start a new chapter?"

I nodded, never willing to do anything more in my life.

...

My sister was over for that weekend to help me pack up my things. Boxes sat everywhere in the flat as I wondered how one person could gather so much crap. The charity bags were fuller than the moving boxes. Hanna scribbled what the boxes contained, so I wouldn't get confused when unpacking later as she worried it would stress me out more than I already was with moving home. Her organising skills were a total bonus right now. At least someone was keeping me on track.

"Did Joshua come to help clear Megan's room?" she asked.

I ripped off the edge of the Sellotape with my teeth, smiling at Hanna's wince when she went on to tell me it was bad for my teeth to do that. I carried on regardless. "No. Trisha and Mick were the only ones here."