First and Last

Weirdly enough...

I've been seeing John for 3 weeks now. Things seem to be going great. I'm still waiting to hear from Vanderbilt. I found myself daydreaming about what my life was going to be once I was out of highschool. Once I was living with Emily and Candace in an apartment. Being free, having fun, being in college. Maybe even still seeing John.
"Emma, snap out of it" Emily says laughing. "What are you daydreaming about anyways?" Candace asks.
"Nothing. So what was the question you wanted to ask me?" I asked strangely. Candace had asked me to meet up with her and Emily because she had something to ask me.
"Ok, first I want you to know I love you, and we've been friends for years and I wouldn't want to do anything to jeopardize that" she says scooting up in her chair. Emily looks at Candace with a strange face. What is going on?
"Candace, cut to the chase" I say.
"Ok, Todd asked me out for tonight. And I didn't want to go without asking you." I could tell she was nervous. But Todd? Really? My only concern was that he's a jerk to girls. He cheats he lies and he breaks their hearts.
"Candace are you sure you want to go out with Todd? I mean he's a man whore"
"Em, I like him. We've been texting and talking for about two weeks now."
"Two weeks? Candace why couldn't you tell me?"
"I was just nervous" she says wiggling in her chair.
"Candace, Emma is kind've right about Todd. Are you sure that's what you want?" Emily says weirdly.
"Yes, he's sweet, to me." I could see how nervous she was. Was it going to be weird? Absolutely. But if she liked him.... "Ok, it's fine with me, but please be careful with him, you know how he is."
Her face lights up and she has a huge smile on her face. I was nervous about it all but I couldn't say no.
**beep beep** my phone rings. It's a text from John. 'Meet me tonight at Ruth's. Bring comfortable shoes :)'
Comfortable shoes? Alright then. "Is this going to be all?" The waitress asks with a huge smile. After a bowl of wings and chocolate cake, I think that's going to be enough. "Yes, thank you" I replied still side tracked about the text John had just sent.
"Any plans tonight, Emma?" Emily asks.
"John and I are going to Ruth's"
"Ruth's? What is that?"
"It's this diner downtown next to a park" I replied. I loved but hated the way he surprised me all the time.
"Cool, I'm going out tonight as well. So I guess we all need to leave and start getting ready for our dates tonight" Emily says standing up in her stained yellow t-shirt. She wore it practically everywhere we went together.
"Good luck with Todd tonight" I said smiling at Candace. She gave a slight grin and stood up.

****
I show up at Ruth's in shock to see it is completely dark. The path is lit up with white lights leading to the metal door. I slowly walk up not knowing what was going to happen. I push the door through and walk in. There standing in front of the bar is John with a huge smile. There are candles all along the bar and a plate with a huge cheeseburger and two sides of fries.
"You're favorite meal..."
"With my favorite guy" I say finishing his sentence. This was amazing and definitely shocking. The place was closed just for us. He's amazing. Absolutely amazing. I walk up
To him and kiss him on the cheek.
"Have a seat" he says turning the red table top chair out.
"So how did you get this place closed just for us?" I ask shoving a fry in my mouth.
"My dad owns it. Ruth was my mom" he says laughing at how excited I seemed.
"Oh, and your mom is?"
"Dead, car accident" he says. Immediately I regretted asking.
"I'm sorry" I reply looking down.
"Ok, Emma c'mon" he stands up and grabs my hand. I follow him out of the diner back onto the lit pathway. "Where are we going?"
"Did you bring comfortable shoes?" He asks.
"Yeah" I say looking down at my purple and white nikes.
"Ok do you trust me?"
"W...what?" I stutter. Trust him? No I don't trust anyone hardly. I see his face glooming down. He sits down on the end of his tuck bed not far from the path.
"Emma are you ok?" He asks reaching for my hand. I sit next to him gloomily and regretting that I'm ruining this whole night.
"I'm sorry, John. I trust you"
"No you don't. I grew up with four sisters. I can tell when you're lying"
"Four?" I say hoping to change the subject.
"What did that guy do to you?"
"How do you know a guy did something?"
"I can just tell." He says sympathetically. I'm nervous at this point. I get nervous anytime any memory of Carter was brought up. I hate that I let him do this to me.
"John, I don't want to talk about it; can we just go do whatever you were planning for us to do? I don't want to spend this night dwelling on something from the past"
"Sure." He stands up and covers my eyes. "Trust me" he says. It made me shiver. What was going to happen?
We walk for what seems like forever, up and down and turning. Then we finally stop and he uncovers my eyes. I see a huge piece of land with nothing but stars. I look down and realize we're on some type of mountain. All you can see for miles is stars and moonlight and trees.
"This is gorgeous." I say with tears welling up in my eyes. Nobody had ever took the initiative to do anything like this for me. I can't help but think 'I've found him. I've found HIM'
We sit down on the grass and lye down. He wraps his arms around me and kisses my head. I was in a great mood until he says
"So what did he do?" I was getting angry. I didn't want to talk about Carter or anything else. I just wanted to be there in that moment. Just him and I.
"You're not going to give it up?"
"Nope. What could be possibly do to hurt you so bad?"
"His name was Carter. We dated for a little over a year. We went on a trip to the beach together with my cousin and his girlfriend. Carter drank one night and he hit me. Really hard. A few days later, we were on the beach and he looks over and says " I cheated with Meredith. And I don't love you anymore. In fact I never did. You're worthless to me now" the fight goes on forever, and in the end he just says he needed more. He and Meredith, my cousin Condrad's girlfriend at that time are now living together in Texas. They come by here every once in a while to mess with me and Conrad. Writing on Windows, busting tires, yelling that we would never find someone to love us. So John, that's why I couldn't say I trust you. Because I don't. With Carter and my sorry dad, I don't trust anyone. I loved Carter. It's a hard thing to hate get over."
"Emma, I'm sorry. You've had a tough life" he sits up and sits me up to look into my eyes that were now filled with tears. "But you can trust me, you can love me. I haven't known you long, but I love you. I knew I did when I saw you in that club. That's why I'm willing to do anything and everything to get you to trust me."
I smile and hug him. I even cried a little. What was an amazing night, turned into a dwell of the past. But I was glad to get it out. All of it. No matter how hard it was