D E S I D E R A T A [ g.d ] ON HOLD

02

I decided to post the second chapter too, because it was already written and why the hell not. I think it is important part of the story that will make some things clearer :) It is not properly edited so excuse me if there are some weird parts - I will get around to edit it soon. Enjoy!

***

The sound of wind drifted through the room, gently moving the window blinds in a steady beat. The room smelled of dust and sex, mixed with the flowery scent of laundry softener that radiated from the sheets that were pushed on the floor last night.

Nellie pressed the white sheet closer to her body, biting her bottom lip to avoid a sob to escape her lips. The tears rolled down her cheeks, over her freckled nose and disappearing somewhere on the pillow. Her whole body shivered as she dared to take a deep breath. The stranger from the last night was sleeping on the other side of the bed, soundly and steady. She didn't dare to turn around to look at him because she was too embarrassed.

She slowly sat up, wiping the tears with the back of her hand, still shaking. It was her first one night stand and it made her feel dirty, embarrassed and guilty. She had rules to follow, rules she wasn't allowed to break; rules that made her regret being alive.

Silently, she reached down, picking up her bra and slowly clasping it behind her back, not bothering to pull up the straps. Few seconds later, she was pulling her panties up, standing up and pulling her crumped dress over her head, leaving the first two buttons in front undone. The man that she slept with stirred and she dreadfully turned around to look at him but heaved a sigh when she realised that he was still asleep.

With her beaten up chelsea boots in one hand, she scrambled her wallet and her phone from the table in the corner, and walked to the doors. Nellie stopped, twisting the doorknob, realising she would probably freeze outside in the harsh wind. After all she only wore the summery dress that was too thin for this part of the year anyway. Turning on her heel, she tiptoed to the corner and grabbed the denim jacket from the chair and in few quick strides, left the room.

"Nellie," George stirred softly but thinking she just left to use the bathroom, he went back to sleep.

***

Nellie was walking down the street, wrapping the denim jacket tighter around her body, crossing her arms around her. Her feet hit the concrete in a cautious way, feeling as if everyone around her knew what she did last night.

This is how walk of shame feels like. – she thought.

She was startled by her phone ringing in the pocket of his jacket and she scarily pulled it out. Nellie heaved a breath of relief seeing her friends name flashing on the screen. With a shaky hand she slid the caller and put the phone to her ear.

"Hello," she croaked out, her voice raspy.

"Nellie," Marcia's voice hissed from the other side of the line. "Where are you? Why didn't you text me back? Where have you been?" Her friend asked in a row, not giving a chance for Nellie to respond. The line went silent before Marcia spoke again, "He called me last night to ask me if you are babysitting Tim!"

"Di–," Nellie stopped on the bus stop, her eyes searching for the right bus line. She had been walking few blocks by now, running away from that motel she stayed at last night. "Did you tell him?"

"No," Marcia replied. "I said I asked you to keep an eye on Tim." Marcia's voice turned from harsh to soft.

"Thank you," Nellie whispered, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand.