Candy Escape Plan - Bleach

Title: Candy Escape Plan

Summary: Sequel to "A Sprinkle of Fairy Dust." Kenpachi's out for blood, namely, Captain Ukitake's blood. But, this creative captain won't be captured so easily. A little bit of candy can be quite handy indeed.

Pairings: None.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of the Bleach series, so you can't sue me.

Warnings: Nothing really.

AN: Yep, you've read right, a sequel to "A Sprinkle of Fairy Dust." Yeah, I couldn't help myself. And just like with my other oneshot, this fic is not to be taken seriously at all. I hope you'll enjoy reading this one as well!

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Ukitake knew this would happen one day, the very next day to be précised. And he really had no one else to blame but himself for his newest and most bizarre predicament. Still, given the chance to hit Captain Kenpachi with glitter bomb in the face again he would do it without a moment's hesitation.

Why? Well, why not? Yachiru-chan thought it was a wonderful idea and she seemed to really enjoy it. And honestly, throwing a glitter bomb into the face of a fighting fanatic who had pretty pink bows in his hair was just too a great of a temptation to deny.

Who else could claim such a feat?

Alas, such a thing came with severe consequences, which was what brought him to his current situation. He was leaping from rooftop to rooftop, Captain Zaraki Kenpachi hot on his heels with his Zanpakutō swinging wildly and with complete and utter abandonment. Clearly, he was out for blood. Namely, his, Captain Juushiro Ukitake of the Thirteenth Division's blood.

"Don't you have a sense of humour, Captain Kenpachi?" Ukitake asked over his shoulder with a laugh as he effortlessly dodged another of his wild swing of his blade.

"Why dontcha stop prancing about so I can show ya my sense of humour?" Kenpachi roared back at him with malice, to which Ukitake could only laugh, sidestepping another one of his attacks.

He hadn't been a captain for over 2000 years for nothing.

Still, he had his moments where he lost his concentration. And unfortunately, the way Kenpachi was able to grab him roughly by the arm and whirl him around to face him was one of those moments.

Hiding a wince, Ukitake tilted his head back to look upon that evilly smiling face, chewing on the inside of his mouth when his gaze slowly travelled to the still traces of pink glitter lining the scalp of his hairline.

"Gotcha," Kenpachi said with a cocky drawl, somewhat pleased with himself as he tightened his grip on his arm, lifting him up into the air so his feet no longer touched the ground.

However, Ukitake just smiled brightly up at him, not even remotely frightened. After all, there were other ways to win a fight. "Not quite yet."

Kenpachi blinked at him with his one uncovered eye. "Eh?"

With his free hand, Ukitake dug around in his captain's Haori, knowing full well that the perfect weapon to get out of this mess was inside. He gave a sound of triumph when he touched it with his fingertips and pulled it out quickly.

"What's that for?" Kenpachi asked him roughly when he brought out a plastic bag of squishy, sticky candy, the kind that takes forever to chew as it gets stuck on your teeth.

And it happened to be the favourite of a certain someone~!

His smile never once wavering, which was starting to creep Kenpachi out, Ukitake suddenly held up the bag of candy and waved it in the air quite excitedly as he drew in a deep breath, getting ready to initiate the first step of his 'get away scot free plan'.

Poor Kenpachi won't know what hit him.

"Yachiru-chan!" Ukitake yelled out as loud and as cheerfully as he could, not caring that he would draw more attention from his other Soul Reapers in his direction. "I have candy for you!"

As soon as those words left his mouth, there was a small explosion in the direction of the Division Eleven barracks and then there was a sound, the oh-so familiar and yet oh-so frightening voice as it echoed effortlessly over the hustle and bustle of the Seireitei.

"Candeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Ah, there's my girl," Ukitake said fondly as Kenpachi made yet another sound that was brimming with confusion.

From the distance, blazing in a smoke trail across the rooftops, sending any unfortunate fool who happened to get in her way into the air, making them complete and perfect a difficult triple reverse somersault was a certain pink-haired little lady. Her smiling face was as bright and cheerful as ever as she held out her tiny little hands in a 'grabby' type motion as she headed directly toward them, not slowing down for an instant. All the while repeating the word 'candy' over and over again.

Upon hearing the voice of his vice-captain, Kenpachi lowered his guard enough for Ukitake to initiate the second part of his escape plan. He lowered the candy package and then ripped it open with his teeth as his other hand was still entrapped within Kenpachi's large and callous hand. Before suddenly and quietly strongly, slamming the sticky continents onto Kenpachi's forehead.

The suddenly force to his forehead startled Kenpachi enough to loosen his grip on Ukitake's arm and Ukitake wasted no time moving away from him, perching himself effortlessly on the other end of the rooftop they were occupying.

Ukitake clapped his hands in front of him and smiled charmingly at his fellow captain. "I'm sorry, but one must to the necessary in order to live healthily."

Disgruntled confusion settled upon Kenpachi's face as he made a motion to remove whatever it was that Ukitake had forced upon him, his visible eye promising retaliation as soon as he was done. But before his fingertips could even graze the sticky candy that seemed to stick to the skin of his forehead like glue, something small and pink plastered herself to the side of his head, almost succeeding in knocking him over by the suddenness of her appearance.

"That's my candy, Ken-chan!" Yachiru yelled as she pounded onto his head with her tiny fists, a huffy and somewhat dangerous look of anger marring her usually cheerful features. "Mine! Mine! Mine!"

"Getoff!" Kenpachi ordered as his arms flailed around as he stumbled around on the slippery tiles, completely unsure of what to do with his vice-captain that was seemingly trying claw at his face off in order to get to the candy that was stuck to his forehead. "What the hell?"

"Caaannndddeeee!"

Really, that would have been the perfect cue for him to slip away, hence completing his escape plan, but the sight before him was just too amusing to walk away from. Ukitake knew that Kenpachi would never do anything to hurt Yachiru and that was what made the sight all the more hilarious. The large, monster of a Captain, being overwhelmed by his pink-haired Cherub? Classic. A bit more glitter would have made the scene all the more memorable.

Ukitake was certain he was just digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole and there will come a time where he'll pay for this incident, as well as the 'Glitter Incident'.

Oh well, at least he'll die laughing.

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