Dan, this is for you.
I'm writing this letter to give you closure, sanity, a way to let go, however you wanna interpret this is up to you honestly.
Dan, seeing as I literally have nothing to lose, I'm just going to say this; I love you. I love you so fucking much and I'm sorry that I never had the chance to do much with that love, I'm sorry we didn't get to grow old together.
Also, I know you love me too Dan, if you don't then I'll be dead anyway so I can't be embarrassed or regretful anyway, I can see that you look at me the same way I look at you, and I wish things had been different; I wish we could've loved and been in live together, without my close, inevitable death looming over us.
Dan, I know that life is hard, and that the future in your head may seem dark, unwelcoming and dim, but I want you to live. I don't want me to be the thing which hold you back from living, which cuts your life short or makes you live and unfulfilled life. You have a part of my heart Dan, take it with you, live for both of us; just like I know you can.
I'm giving you back Lion. He's here for when I need to be brave, but I know that after I die you'll need to be braver. Death is easy Dan, living is hard but I know that your life is worthwhile and I have no doubt that you will do something that will change the world; just as you changed mine.
I love you so much Dan, and I don't care if that means I have to fucking party with satan or some shit, because I'll know then that I'll be joined by you eventually. Until then, live, love and change people's words. Be the light in people's lives, just as we are for each other. But also, grow old with a part of me in your heart.
I'll see you on the other side,
Phil ♡
YOU ARE READING
heart like yours / phan
Fanfiction"i'm counting down the days to go." or in which a boy who is waiting for his life to be over may be losing to cancer, but he also saved his best friend's life and, in return, won his heart.
