Thoughts Of Life!!??

Hidden

I try to stay hidden the fear of people finding out what I am, Cursing screams of this  world, The nightmares, There screams,I don't want to be alone no more,but I'm scared Ill hurt someone I love, I have to stay away no matter what happens but this boy just keeps coming back, he keeps coming back to me trying to help,I pushed him away scared of him getting hurt from me,there's a demon inside if the power beyond my soul my demon  skills for living I just don't want him to die he killed my mother and father over rage and anger some trying to kill me because of the demon I was little back then I couldn't control it my father was the one who put it in me the one who cursed me to be like this the one who cursed me to live in a house live in this life those names in bowling cutting the pain depression anxiety simple words that cannot describe what I'm feeling I feel worse than any of these words I feel as though I am betrayed by my own mother and father betrayed for them trying to kill me what they have done to me my father was a drug addict my mother was always drunk did always beat me ice cream and it I learned to deal with the pain and suffering of it all I learned to deal with her it hurt I would always laugh at them for when they hurt me I do not feel the pain but they were calling me the bruises showed in the scars and scratches I would never feel the pain again for they push me so far to where I am numb to where my breath takes awhile to catch up to where the pain does not phase me and never will I guess this is what happens you live in awful life for all the family and all her friends.    
                     -Alanah hunt