Poland x Reader Crack: The Mall

1/1

"Like, Y/N,  you need to like, totally shop with meee!!" 

You grunted and turned away from Feliks, focusing on your gameboy. 
"Y/N!! Notice me senpai!" 
"No." 
Feliks whined and started pulling a struggling you out of your house and into his hot pink car. You spotted a traumatized Toris tied down to the front seat, you knew how scared Toris was of Feliks's shopping sprees...

~Flash Back~ 

Feliks pulled Toris into a mall, and two hours later...
"LIKE, OUT OF MY WAY!!!" He was viciously fighting with a teenage girl over a pink skirt. 
"THIS WOULD LOOK WAY BETTER ON ME THAN YOU DAMMIT!" she yelled, Feliks punched her and was banned from the store for two months. 

~Flash Back End~ 

"Like, come on Y/N! It's buy one get one free at Forever 21!"

Liet was very, very scared. 
Feliks grabbed both of your arm's (your's and Toris's) and pushed you and Toris into Forever 21, he sat you both down at a bench and saw a blue and green dress, he was about to grab it when a black haired woman snatched it out of his hand. He roared a mighty roar and pounced, he took the dress and ran.

But while that was going on, poor Toris was surrounded by fan girls. 
"mARRY ME TORIS!" 
"LET'S FRENCH KISS LIET!" 
"GET IN MY TRUNK SO I CAN KIDNAP YOU AND LOVE YOU!"

Toris curled up into a ball on the floor and cried in fear. 

Poland turned around and turned into a mighty lion and fought of the evil fan girls.

The fan girls screamed in agony for he did the. Worst. Thing. Possible. 
HE DESTROYED THEIR CLOTHES!!! 
The girls and the poor boy that accidentally got caught in his fury ran out of the store screeching.

Soon after Poland came waltzing out of a changing room in the blue and green dress.
"So do I look like, tots fab or what?"

Feliks twirled around with a kissy face. 
"I should totally buy it! You can have my second one, Y/N! You'd look FAB-U-LOUUSSS~~!"

"Ummm..."

Feliks let out a fan girl screech.
"AAAHHH YOU'D LOOK LIKE, TOTALLY ADORBS!"

Toris was lying paralyzed on the floor, being scared of fan girls.

tHEN SUDDENLY A WILD AMERICA CRASHED THROUGH THE WALLS THROWING CHEESE BURGERS!!!
Feliks screeched and hid behind you and Toris.

"DON'T HIT MY DRESS! DON'T HIT MY DRESS!"
You giggled and bought Feliks's two dresses (one now your's) and led the scared shitless Toris and the sobbing Feliks out of the store.