Unwritten

‘He leans in and kisses my forehead. I laugh because there is no such thing astrue love.’

“Then I delete that embarrassment of a chapter.” I laugh, mocking my sloppily written work.

I wanted to be a real writer. To write the kind of romances every girl dreams about, but I can’t. Rereading my work from the previous chapter I begin considering deleting the entire thing. ‘How am I supposed to finish this book now?’ I think to myself with a frown. I clearly had no idea what I was getting myself into but I shouldn’t have done it.

I pick up my cell phone from beside my laptop. Four missed calls from the publisher…how did I know? I decide reluctantly to call him back before he decides not to publish my failure of a story.

After three rings he finally answers. “Hello?” His annoyingly squeaky voice rings in my ear.

“Hey I saw that you tried to call me?” I asked slowly listening to his heavy sigh on the other side of the phone.

“Yes well it seems we have a problem Ms.-“He trails off having forgotten my name again.

“Yea I know, about the book I just have had the worst writers block and I know you wanted it two weeks ago but I still haven’t finished and, and, I just can’t do this. I’m so sorry.” I squeak into the phone and sniffle quietly holding back the tears. I felt like I had failed, maybe I just wasn’t cut out for this.

“No, you’re not giving up on me- I mean this story. People are counting on this being released and you can’t let them down!” The words seem to gush out before I hear the audible snap of his jaw clamping shut.

“I don’t want to be rude but nobody even knows I’m writing anything but you. Who could possibly be waiting on me to finish my story?” I ask him even though I’m not sure I want to know.

“Only the publishers of the best up and coming writers’ magazine, Up and Coming Writers.” I can practically hear the smile in his voice and my stomach feels as if it’s just plummeted ten stories down. I almost swear I can feel my stomach below my feet.

“What?” I choke out and cover my mouth with a trembling hand. I take a deep, steadying breath trying to get a grip on reality, but the room is spinning. I can hardly breathe when I feel the pang of fear deep in my belly.

“That’s right! They want to feature you since I’m a popular publisher and I’ve never published a bad book, I talked to them about you and they want you to be the cover story!” He shouts in my ear and I rip the phone from my ear. I gulp down the lump in my throat and the words replay in my head. I can’t even fake excitement, I was planning on giving up and now I’m being featured in the most exclusive writers magazine for new writers?

“Wha- How do I finish? I am, in a way, attempting the impossible here.” I state clearly gaining composure.

“What do you mean, ‘attempting the impossible’? He asks clearly confused about my lack of experience here.

“Well you see, the thing is, I’ve never been in love before! I’ve dated I’ve just never been in love and I’m trying to write about being in love! How do I write about feelings I haven’t even had?” I let it all out and take a breath feeling the air entering and exiting my lungs as I finally calm down.

“Easy, fall in love.” I notice what he’s hinting at but I blow it off. I know exactly what he wants me to do. He wants me to date him, but I won’t, I have something else in mind, a way out of dating him.

“That’s a great idea! I have the perfect guy in mind too! He goes to the café every day like me! We’ve just never spoken before but I’ll make it happen. Thank you for the brilliant idea!” I exclaim and hang up just before he has the time to tell me that isn’t what he meant. Maybe his idea will work…just not with him, or the fake guy from the café.

**** 

I decided that if I wanted to get anything done in the way of writing I might as well visit the café to get some coffee. I assumed it’d be hard to find love if you’re sleeping on the first date. I go to the café and order my usual, iced French vanilla coffee. I take a large sip of my coffee glancing around the nearly vacant café. This was the first time I’d come here without my laptop, not distracted my weak writing attempts. I could finally smell the bitter sweet aroma of freshly brewed coffee. The old brown linoleum complimented by the cream colored walls seemed to glow under the sun’s rays that the front, glass doors allowed in. Very few people sat about the booths drinking coffee and eating assorted pastries. I couldn’t help but find myself wondering if any of them were regulars here, like me. I wondered if anyone recognized me. As I sat in the large coffee colored booth I flipped these thoughts around in my mind until I was interrupted by the chiming of the bell on the door. I watched a man as he walked in and found the seat directly in front of the window, the only one there. I found myself questioning why there was only one and why he was the luckier of the two of us who got to sit there.  A waitress took his order quickly and returned with it only moments later as if she’d already had it made. Realizing I had been staring I avert my eyes and twirl my straw around in my coffee. I’d gotten a large that I almost wasn’t sure I could finish. That’s when I knew exactly what I was going to do next.

****

I could hear the music blaring all around me, almost as much as I could feel the thumping of the base shake the building. The lights were rolling around the room, dancing across my face in the darkness. Bodies swayed, people pushed roughly through the crowds none of them even fazed by the loud music or the lights that landed on them. If I weren’t a grown woman I would’ve reached for my best friends hand in this moment. I was petrified of the scene before me. I’d never once been in a club though I’m almost positive that April had been, several times. She eased her way through the crowd motioning for me to follow her. We fought our way through the mass of dancing people and up to the front where a small bar was located. She ordered us both a beer and even though I usually didn’t drink, there was nothing stopping me from relaxing just a little, not now.

“I’m not so sure this was a good idea, maybe we should go home.” I suggest with a light chuckle trying to blow off the feeling of fear in my lower abdomen.

“Oh come on scaredy pants, you’ll be fine I do this all the time!” She shouts loudly over the music and grabs my hand pulling me out to dance. I notice how much more conservative we dance compared to the others on the floor. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all. After a while of dancing our drinks are gone and we head back for more. As soon as I step up to the bar I notice how cute the bartender is. I order the drinks to give myself an excuse to talk to him. I needed to fall in love, maybe it was with him. He pushes the drinks across the counter to me and smile brushing fingertips against his as I take the glasses. With a smile I thank him and turn briskly on my heel thinking that he just might be interested. Suddenly I found my body to be very interested in the floor and the beer that soaked my skin. I could feel the broken glass covering me and I push myself up, pulling a small glass fragment from my hand. I gasp when I notice that many people had stopped and stared at me, many of them laughing. I frown in disgust and push myself from the floor dusting myself off. I whirl around to face april and the bartenrder  doubled over with laughter at my fall. I grasp april tightly by the arm and push through the surrounding crowd. I make sure to brush against some of the ones laughing leaving the bitter sent of beer on them as I passed. April in tow, I make my way to her car and get itno the passenger seat avoiding her gaze.

“Start the car.” I snap anger causing my pulse to jump in my throat, I can feel it, pulsing throughout my body, the frantic beat of my heart.

She stuck the keys in the ignition and turned them, the car slowly roaring to life. She back out and starts the long ride home. We don’t talk the whole way home she focuses on the road while I focus on the passing streetlight that, much to my disliking, reminded me of the flashing lights of the club. Maybe I could add this fairytale to my book.

She dropped me off at my house and I got out of the car without a word to her. I headed inside slamming the door behind me. I opened my laptop unsure of what I was going to type but I let my hands do all the thinking. Fingers flying across the keyboard I let all my anger out onto the keyboard. After finishing my chapter I sit back and read my work. This is the first chapter id written in a long time that I actually like! I save it at least four times and after id finally finished I smiled. It may not be finished yet but I was well on my way.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Vote if you liked it and leave a comment with your thoughts on this chapter! Thanks again for reading my first book on wattpad! (: