The One Who Loved Him

And Alec Finds Out Her Secret

I was all alone when I woke up in Magnus and Alec's room. My heart was pounding loudly in my ears from the cold terror running through my entire body after that nightmare. His face... So cold, so... so twisted. It wasn't the boy I had fallen for. What had taken him over... Had to be demonic. He wouldn't purposely stab me repeatedly in the stomach until my intestines split out through the slits, would he? I laid back on the pillow, tears trailing down from my eyes. He would. He would look at me with disgust and hate.

What was going to happen to me after I had them? Would I die? Jocelyn didn't. Be rational, Elizabeth. I let out a squeaky sigh and got up to go to the bathroom. The floorboards squeaked underneath my weight as I tiptoed to the door. Maybe I was just worried. Maybe these nightmares were a result from his blood I had ingested. Or maybe, they were happening because of his DNA swirling with mine to make a half demon, half shadowhunter child. That last reason made sense. I looked at myself in the mirror as I washed my hands. There were bags under my eyes from lack of sleep and restless nights. My once blue eyes had lost the light in them and were red from me crying. Seeing my face the way it was, I began crying even harder.

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He had only woken up to get a glass of water, not to find his best friend crying her eyes out in the bathroom. It started out as little whimpers that he guessed were the result of the nightmares running through her head. Shrugging it off, he padded his way to the kitchen and tried quietly to open a cabinet to get a glass. As he lifted the knob to the faucet for the liquid, he made out what happened to be small cries. His thirst put aside, he quickly made for the door on the hall with a short glance to see if Magnus had stirred from his slumber on the couch.

"Eliza?" he asked in a small voice.

The crying didn't stop, maybe got quieter.

"Are you okay?"

"Go away." came her weak, shaky reply.

"Alright." He turned, but something at the back of his mind made him stop. "No, I'm coming in."

"I said go away, Alec."

"I'm not going anywhere." Alec gasped at the scene in front of his eyes. "What the hell?"

She sat with a short, blood stained silver dagger in her hand, the other arm laid out across her lap with an unintelligible phrase carved into her pink flesh. Her face was tear stained from her hard crying, a look of pure helplessness dancing in the features. "I told you to go away."

Alec stepped forward and squatted, his hand outstretched but not fully reaching the young woman in fear of her slicing at him. "Why?"

She looked up at him with her swollen red eyes and didn't say anything; she didn't have to, really. Alec knew her well enough to know what the look meant. Instead, he took the dagger out of her hand and pulled her close, tucking the injured arm in his lap. She sobbed into the material of his grey cotton shirt, her entire body shaking with heaving effort. He let her cry, knowing it would make her feel better, hoping that she'd tell him what was going on for once. After she had cried all she could, she sat back, and with her uninjured hand, wiped at her eyes. He didn't look at her, and she didn't ask for his attention. They sat in silence for a while before Alec took notice to the words cut into her skin.

"What does 'I'll never have your love again' mean?"

"None of your business." Eliza replied.

"It is my business when you decide to slice up your arm with meaningless stuff on the floor of my bathroom." He said matter-of-factly.

"I can't tell you." she whispered.

"Damn it, Eliza. Yes you can! I'm tired of not knowing anything! I'm your best friend! What happened to always telling each other everything?" he demanded, knowing full and well it sounded whiny and girly.