It by Alexa Chung

Heartbreak

THE problem with heartbreak is that nobody can help you when you’re heartbroken. Nobody and nothing. Not the films you watch alone desperately searching for a character who feels the way you do, not the glasses or bottles of whisky you keep by your bed and certainly not Instagram. Instagramwill not mend your broken heart, despite your best efforts to post pictures of yourself looking ‘happy’. Every time you post a picture of yourself to Instagram looking fake happy a fairy dies. Fact. Also, scrolling through photos of girls your ex may or may not be shagging won’t help you. You need to remind yourself that the right filter can be fantastically flattering and she probably doesn’t look that good in real life.

Sometimes when I need answers I like to take my questions to Google. I have googled ‘how long does heartbreak last?’ The result more popular than that was ‘how long does heartburn last?’ This implies people suffer from heartburn more than they do heartbreak which is a good thing because heartbreak sucks way fucking more than acid reflux ever could. Weirdly though a broken heart does physically hurt. It feels heavy, like someone is sitting on your chest. Sometimes you wake up with pins and needles in your right arm. I met a girl who told me that an acupuncturist told her that if this happens you have a broken heart. The irony of a pin and needle therapist being an expert on needles and pins is fantastic. And that’s the other thing it’ll do to you. Heartbreak will force you to strike up conversation with anyone who will listen and who might be able to tell you it’s going to be okay.

One night in Paris I saw Marianne Faithfull sitting in the corner of a bar. I am a self-confessed groupie – I have never dated a man who was not a lead singer. To me, Marianne Faithfull is the holy grail of Groupiedom. So of course in a drunken haze (it was Fashion Week) I barrelled over to her and just straight up asked her how she got over Mick Jagger. Because how, HOW, do you get over Mick Jagger?!! She said, ‘Dahhhling, you can’t believe the lyrics.’ I don’t really know what this means. So I asked my mum instead (about heartbreak, not Mick Jagger (I wish)) and she told me:

‘Nobody goes through life without having their heart broken and one day you’ll wake up and it will be okay.’

What's your best advice for overcoming heartbreak? Leave your answer in the comments section.

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