Back to You

Destiel - Let It Go (song fic)

from walking home and talking loads

We had started talking to each other about five minutes into the walk home from school. There was a good hour and a half to walk from December Bay High School to Ashley Street, where we both lived. Ashley Street was on the complete other side of town. "I'm Castielle." A slight laugh emitted from his lips. "Dean."

to seeing shows in evening clothes with you

Dean had found out that Matilda was one of my favourite movies so he used three weeks worth of waiter tips to buy two tickets to the play. I had worn a black dress that fell to my knees with a tan overcoat. Dean wore a dark blue tuxedo that set his green eyes off. The play was amazing. 

from nervous touch and getting drunk

After two months of dating, we had decided to have drinks together. Dean poured me a whiskey and Coke and poured himself a rum and Coke. I started off sitting on the couch and Dean was on the recliner. By the time we had each finished our glass, he was sitting next to me on the couch and rubbing my knee.

to staying up and waking up with you

It was two a.m. when I fell asleep. Dean must've carried me into the bedroom because I woke up on the bed. There was a weight on my hip and I twisted around to see what it was. Dean. He blinked in the bright sunlight and smiled at me. I smiled back. The clock read 2:43 p.m.

i was sleeping at the edge, holding something we don't need

It was two years after waking up in the same bed with Dean. I knew that the relationship was coming to an end when he said my name with a sad tone. "Castielle?" I was sitting at the kitchen counter with a coffee in front of me. Humming at him, I look up from my book.  Here it comes, I thought. "Are you happy? With us?"

oh, this delusion in our heads is gonna bring us to our knees

I wasn't expecting this. I nodded. I WAS happy with our relationship. "Yes. Are you?" I wanted to know what his thoughts were on the relationship. No, I NEEDED to know. "I'm happy, but you don't seem happy anymore. There's no point to this if the both of us aren't happy."

so c'mon let it go

Dean had a very valid point. There was no point to it if both Dean and I weren't happy. "So . . . what did you want to do, Dean?" My voice was barely above a whisper. I focused on the small tattoo on his bare chest: a small devil's trap. "I don't know. What do you mean?"

just let it be

He had me stumped. I wanted him, but all we seemed to do was fight. "Dean . . ." A defeated look crossed his face. "This is  part where you say 'it's not you, it's me,'right? Because I was dreading this part." I cracked a smile, despite the somber mood and conversation. "No, it's not."

why don't you be you

A slight smile appeared on his face. "What I want is us. But that won't work if all we do is fight. Am I right? Because you're the only thing I've ever wanted. And for the past two weeks, you've been ignoring me. We live in the same apartment, for God's sake!"

and I'll be me 

The smile disappeared immediately. Stunned silence filled the kitchen. We looked at each other, me with tear-filled eyes, him with a frown on his face. "Cassie, I'm so sorry." Dean stepped toward me, then stopped. I stood up and took the last three steps toward him. 

from throwing clothes across the floor

I folded into him. "It's okay. It was never your fault." His arms wrapped around me and secured me. Droplets fell into my black hair and I began to cry. Tears cascaded down both of our cheeks as I pulled away. "I love you, Dean. And I'm so sorry for the last two weeks."

to teeth and claws and slamming door at you

Turning back to my coffee and book, I heard him whisper. "I never blamed you, Cass." I forgot the coffee and whipped around. I cupped Dean's face and felt his hands drop to my waist. He walked backwards, taking me to the couch. Sitting down, I broke the kiss. But he kissed me again.

used to recognize myself, its funny how reflections change

The kiss got heated and his fingers wound into my hair. A moan left me as he tugged the ends. I missed this. The slow simmer building into a heated fire. I slid my hand around Dean's neck and played with the hair at the nape of his neck. I rolled off him, needing to breathe. 

when we're becoming something else, I think it's time to walk away

Looking him straight in the eyes, I thought of something I hadn't in a while."Dean, what do you think about having a baby? I know it's sudden, but I've just had a thought. We can reconnect as we raise a child." He just stared at me. I began to get nervous. But he answered. "Let's start trying.

so c'mon let it go

Nine months later, I held a baby boy swaddled in a dark blue blanket. Dean was beside me, smiling through tears. "What should we name him?" My voice cracked on him. His grin grew wider. I knew he had a name ready that I would like. "How 'bout Gabriel Benjamin Winchester?" I smiled and looked down at the amazing child in my arms. "It's perfect."