She's At It Again

Chapter Two

Months came, we became friends. Yes, we're friends and I'm happy about us being that. But still, there is something I cannot explain nor understand. Some people call it butterflies under my stomach? Oh wait. It's butterflies in my stomach.

Then here's my best friend. I call her the bridge. "Our" bridge.

Everyday and almost every night, I intentionally tease her to you so that we can be close. Still not crystal clear to you eh? Here's the truth. I used her just to get ourselves closer. Now you understand? And yes, I made a stupid move again.

I used her 'cause here's me, having her anxiety again. I'm beyond shy to talk and even show up to you. Now that's me.

A month came after, I was still on this I called "a plan" and still not giving up. Then one day, a news came that you and my bestfriend are now stated as acquaintances, then came being friends. I felt queasy and jealous on what you two were having but I shouldn't be 'cause I know deep inside that I made this, I started this. And to be more specific, You're not even mine. Everytime you two were having a chat, small talks and anything, I am hurt. And one more thing, I shouldn't be jealous because I made this.

Have you heard of someone hurting herself? Yes, it's called small suicide. It slowly kills me.

A day came, I was again surprised and made my eyes get big as fck. You sent a message.

"Hello." You said.

"Oh hi." I stupidly replied.

"I was just wondering how you are?"

I laughed a bit. "What? Why'd ask such a thing?"

"Hmm. Nothing."

"Oh okay." Ok? That's a bit weird though.

You then sent an image of a girl. "You know her, right?"

"Yup, she's my best friend. Why?" Why would he send and image of my best friend? Why would he ask me if I know her? Does he like her?

"Hmm. I just like her."

Woah. Just fucking woah. Okay? I think I'm having suicide. My conclusions are too real to be true.

"Hello? You still there?" You once again sent a message after a few moments.

And that's it. That was the last message I saw before I found myself lying down in bed, nearly crying. I'm at it again.