The car was in pure silence not a single sound coming from either of us and I wasn't even thinking of saying ANYTHING to him. I don't even know what I would say to him 'Oh I forgot to tell you that you were going to be a father of 2 more children you know I forgot it in the rush of the whole leaving the house fiasco.But you saw Ellen right?Anyway how is life? 'Yeah right.
Suddenly my mouth opened and the magical words to make an already awkward situation even more awkward flowed right out of my mouth. "How did you find me?" He didn't reply thank God but then.....the car slowed down as he stopped it to the side of the road and kept staring at the front his face blank.
"I know I have messed up big time but I deserve to be there if not for you but at least for my kids." I could hear the pain in his voice when he said this.he was hurt and I understood it but between that pain there was anger and it was valid but I wish it wasn't there.
When I first saw him enter the room of the doctors room all I wanted to do was hug him to be safe in his warm embrace.Every night when I used to miss his warm presence beside me cuddling with me pulling me into him.His beard tickling my neck as his face nuzzled into the crook of my neck.In the morning when I would wake up with the sunlight hitting my face. This time my husband wasn't there who would lay in front of me and not let anything wake me up cuddling with me on the cold mornings when we used to leave the windows of the little balcony attached to our room open. I missed him every single night and I just wanted him to be with me regardless of what had happened between us. But the first time I wanted to see him after 3 months wasn't supposed to be like this it wasn't supposed to be silence it was supposed to be filled with happiness and me forgiving him and us just giving into the fact that we can't live without each other but instead it is us in a car not being able to say a word to each other.Me not knowing what to say and him not wanting to say.
"I don't know if you thought this but I did and the guys and girls agreed with me so when I asked them they told me everything they knew so I finished my work and came here got to the house and Arisha told me you were out to drop Aleeza I asked her to call you and she did you told her about the doctor and I went there.Here we are now." He said looking down. I fumbled with my hands and spoke up quietly.
"I didn't mean to hide it from you you know." It was like this was the last straw for Zayn as he shouted.
"Then what did you want to do?It clearly looks like you didn't want me to know that I was going to be a father of 4." I took a deep breath.
"The night when it all happened I was sitting there waiting for you with a cake and balloons and everything but then you came with your drunken ass and did all that. I could have told you but I knew if I did you would stop me and make me stay....and I-I just couldn't stay Zayn so at that moment it seemed to be the best thing." I said as I went through a mix of emotions.
First guilt then anger then sadness and regret with a hint of guilt. I am already having these major mood swings what will happen when I am 8 months in? I got out of my trance and looked at Zayn.
That is when I realized we weren't parked at the side of the road anymore we were infact on the way back to Arisha' s place.Zayn had a straight face as his hands held the steering wheel tightly that his knuckles turned white and his jaw was clenched tightly. We again restored to the sound of the air conditioning in the car and the distinct sound of the cars and traffic on the roads of New York. We soon got to Arisha' s house .
Once he parked in the empty driveway.He went out of the car soon appearing at my side as he opened the door.
Without looking at me AT ALL he put his hand infront of me to take. I slid my hand in his as my skin burned at the feeling of his familiar big and rough hands. I guess he felt it too as he intertwined his fingers with mine and held my hand gently yet firmly.It made me smile inside despite the situation and everything still like....I still love him and he has the same affect on me and this gesture made me have this light of hope that even though he was mad he loved me. I got out carefully holding my stomach with one hand.As soon as my feet were in the ground Zayn's arm was quick to curl itself around my waist placing his palm flat on my stomach and running it making me snap my head up at him.His head turned to me for a mere second as I stared into his eyes.Though he was quick to turn his head back to stare at the ground. He helped me to climb the steps before ringing the bell and within seconds Arisha appeared.
As soon as her eyes connected with my eyes a look of guilt washed over her face. She stepped aside to let us in but only Zayn stepped in and soon disappeared somewhere.
"Arisha what is going on? Do you know something about this whole ordeal?"I said eyeing her carefully as I stepped in taking off my coat and leaving my bag in a corner of the entrance. She shifted uncomfortably under my harsh gaze as eyed her.
She was looking everywhere except looking at me as she played with her fingers.I KNEW SHE HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS! "What did you do Arisha???" I groaned-moaned.
She looked at me and spoke up exhasperatedly "I can explain!Come on to my room." I looked at her for a second as she turned towards the stairs looking at me nervously.
I sighed giving in as I walked towards the stairs brushing past her. She sighed in relief and followed behind me .I went on her room and seated myself on her bed seeing Shaharyar was at work. She close the door softly behind herself as Aryaan was sleeping.
I was pretty loud now that I think of it.....Oops! She came and say beside me as I stared at my entwined fingers that rested on my lap. "He called me this morning. You had told me about the plane thing so I was expecting him to come anytime but that call still shocked me. So I was in the kitchen with Shaharyar and I got his call. I was confused at first to see how name but once it sinked in I realised the inevitable was happening. I picked it up and he asked just one question "What is your address?" I stayed quiet for a while and didn't reply to him I didn't know what to say. "Arisha I know she is at yours just tell me " I told him the address.For starters he deserves it even though he has done some messed up shit but they are his kids too and not telling him...Zara imagine you getting to know you were going to be a father by a fucking gossip channel or by some Twitter trend or multiple mentions TELLING you that. How would it feel? I know he abused you,broke your trust,cheated but Zara he is still your husband and I know he still loves you and I know you do too and as the father of those two he did deserve to be the first one even after your separation even if it wouldn't play out for you but it was the right thing to do and seeing you didn't do that don't you think he deserves an explanation?" She said being all nobely and wise with me.....I HATED IT.
That is only because Every time she spoke like that I knew she was wrote and I couldn't argue with that.
I huffed "But he wants me to go with him!!!HOW CAN I GO BACK WITH HIM?!??" I said and to be honest it was a bit over dramatic on my side but like I give a shit about that.
I think we all are I have bigger problems. "So?" she said as if she didn't see any problem in it or didn't see any problem in it."Sooo...I CAN'T GO BACK WITH HIM!!!" I said in a freaking out tone.
"Why not?" She asked as if the answer was NOT self explanatory seeing the past and why we were IN this situation in the first place.
"I am not ready to see him. If I go with him I will have to talk to him and listen to him and I know I will at one point melt at the like first time he tried to explain himself." I said exhasperatedly and I was a bit hyper.
She was looking at me as if waiting for me to further say something.Once I didn't say anything she spoke up with raised eyebrows " And that is a bad thing because.....?" She said looking at me with the same quizzical look.
I sighed because I didn't know why either."I don't know.....mayne because I want us both to come to terms in our own time when WE know we are ready.I don't want it to happen because we are supposed to be husband and wife or the situation is awkward.We should come back together because we both have clean hearts with no grudge or problems with eachother."
"Look I hear you. I understand.But I know Zayn and I know once you explain it to him he will be understanding." She said persuading me. I missed I knew Zayn would never force me he maybe angry right now but he still cares.
"Now go talk to him and first solve the not telling him problem okay.Baby steps.With that I hugged and thanked her before going out of my room to the only guest bedroom down the hall.
I wiped my sweaty palms with my jeans I knocked on the door taking in a ragged nervous breath as I heard footsteps come closer and the knob twisted so agonizingly slowly that I thought my heart will burst. That is just what he does to me.
(A/N)
I AM SOOOOOO SOOOOO SOOOO SOOOOOORRRRYYYY. I KNOW I AM SO LATEEEE.But guys life has been crazy MUN'S and tests and school and friends and family and like I have been all over the place.But I am finally here with a chapter savour it and don't trust me but don't give up on me.Bye I hope you enjoy.
-Peace out👊
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Making The End's Meet (Z.M) (Sequel to TRB) :Completed
Fanfiction"I don't even know what to say!" she said tears brimming her eyes. He stepped forward "Just believe me!" he saidholding both her hands in his large ones bending his head down pressing his forehead with hers. Her eyes were shut ti...
