As I ring the doorbell to Ste's house, I suddenly begin to panic. What happens if it all goes wrong? What if I do something stupid, to embarrass myself? Maybe I should turn around and go home, maybe this was a terrible idea and- "Hey guys come in!" Too late.
My palms are sweaty, I can feel my whole body shaking as I walk through the house, into the party room. I've only ever been to a few big parties before, cause I'm not particularly popular. Don't get me wrong, I have friends, and I'm certainly not unpopular, but since I'm not rich, don't have a super cool boyfriend and don't do weed every weekend at parties, I'm not one of the cool kids. That's okay. I think I'm better off where I am, in my small circle of friends.
This music is so loud, and since it's a 16th birthday party, 90% of the people here are already pissed. And it's only 9 o' clock!
My mum spent quite a lot of money on my dress and hair & makeup for tonight, because she knows it's a big party and it'll probably be my last - until University anyway. So before I came I felt good. I stood in front of the mirror and looked at myself. I felt pretty, and I wanted to hold on to that. Now that I'm here though, that confidence has gone out the window.
I start to look around for anyone I know, because my best friend Charlotte who I came with has already managed to cop off with one of the lads here. That doesn't surprise anyone, since she's a stunner. I think people seem to be surprised that Charlotte's friends with us, because she looks like a star, and a lot of people want to be her friend, but she's never ditched us. Oh yeah, apart from when it comes to boys. We're very different, Charlotte and I. Some people call her a slag, because she does get about a bit and she's far from a virgin. But she's lovely, and she's just being young which is perfectly normal. Besides, most people in our year have had sex by now. I however, am one of the minority who hasn't. There's no one that I trust and like enough to want to lose my virginity to, other than Lucas obviously. But that would never-
"Riley!" I don't turn around. Shivers run up my spine and the hairs stick up all over my body.
"Riley! Hey, Riley?" Was that who I think it is? Am I dreaming? Slowly, I begin to turn myself around, as if in a fairytale.
Oh. Not Lucas.
It's just Owen again. I know he fancies me, he has done for weeks now, but he's just er... not for me.
"Oh hey Owen I actually can't really talk right now I kind of need to find Charl." There's an awkward silence for a good couple of seconds and I can't help but feel bad. "Have you seen her? Owen?" His head drops but he quickly becomes agitated. Owen seems to think that we have some kind of connection that draws us together simply because our parent's used to work together. That's not the case. Anywho, he's a nice boy, but I'll just never like him in that way. "No. Sorry, I've not seen her." He turned around and walked away. Poor lad.
It's not long until I've found some people to talk to, and eventually Charlotte comes stumbling out of the bathroom with another boy - both, 'tipsy', shall we say.
I've still not seen Lucas, but I think he might be outside in the garden and no one wants to go out there with me because it's cold. I guess I'll just have to wait.
