Jar Of Hearts ♚ BOOK TWO ♚

Chapter Eight - Deathbeds

you're going to fucking hate me after this. Sorry.  and fuck you I have two BMTH songs and two P!ATD songs idgaf

warning: suicide

▲ ᴛʜɪʀᴅ ᴘᴇʀsᴏɴ ᴘ̶ᴏ̶ᴠ̶  ▲

Louis was woken up in the middle of the night because Harry had been poking his back for the past fifteen minutes. "What do you want?" Louis groaned, wishing that Harry would just disappear. "We need to talk," Harry said, and Louis groaned again, looking at the small alarm clock on the bedside table.

"It's four in the morning, Harold." Louis scolded, turning over to look at Harry. "I know that," Harry said, and Louis narrowed his eyes at him and glared. "It can wait until the morning," Louis said, turning back around and pulling the blanket tighter around himself.

"No, it can't." Harry said and suddenly shoved Louis off the bed. "Fuck I hate you!" Louis exclaimed, getting up off the ground and pushing his fringe away from his face. "The feeling's mutual," Harry said, and Louis sat down on the bed.

"I kind of wish I would've just run you over with my car." Harry mumbled, and Louis gave him a bitch please face. "Maybe you should've listened to me for once," Louis said, subconsciously running his hand along Harry's name on his wrist.

Harry didn't know what he was thinking, mainly because he wasn't thinking, but he leaned foreword and kissed Louis. Harry pulled back immediately, and Louis slowly touched his lips, giving Harry a blank face.

Louis pushed Harry onto his back and climbed on top of him, kissing him deeply. Harry kissed him back, tangling his fingers in Louis' hair. "I thought you wanted to talk," Louis said, a bit breathless. "We can talk later," Harry said, kissing him again.

 Louis was trying to make the kiss last as long as he could, because he knew that Harry would snap out of whatever the fuck this was and go back to hating him, so he'd enjoy the feeling of Harrys lips on his own while he could.

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Louis woke up the next morning to someone shuffling around. He opened his eyes and look up to see Harry pulling his shirt over his head. Louis' clothes were still scattered about on the floor, and he smirked. "That's never happening ever again." Harry snapped once he realized Louis was awake.

"But you were so good, Hazza. You always are-" "Shut the fuck up!" Harry shouted, cutting him off. "Just... Keep your fucking mouth shut, okay?" Harry said quietly, and Louis just nodded. "I hate you! I hate you so much, yet there's a small part of me that still loves you and I hate it!" Harry suddenly shouted, finally breaking.

Louis sat there in silence at Harry's outburst. "Put your clothes on, I'll be back in a few minutes." Harry said and left the hotel room, his words bouncing around in Louis' head. He got up from the bed and pulled his clothes on and sorted out his hair, sitting back down on the bed.

Harry loved him, even if it was only a small part of Harry, he still loved him. Louis didn't hate Harry at all. He may have said it, but Louis was a liar. Louis loved Harry more than anything.

Harry then came back into the room and grabbed his bag, telling Louis to follow him before leaving the room. Louis pulled his shoes on and ran after Harry, who was throwing his bag into the boot of his car. "Get it." Harry spat, and Louis did as he said.

Harry got into the car and started the engine, speeding out of the parking lot and down the main road, leaving the small town behind them.

"So, about what you said back in the hotel room...?" Louis said after they had been driving for a few hours in silence. "I don't love you. That's that." Harry said, staring at the road. "Oh," Louis mumbled, feeling like Harry had just ripped his heart of his chest and set it on fire.

"Where are we going?" Louis asked, sounding timid, which was something Harry hadn't heard in a long time. "I honestly don't know." Harry said, and Louis just nodded. "It's not like we can ever go back. You helped a criminal escape." Louis said and Harry let out a bitter chuckle.

"How do you know that I'm not just going to turn you in?" Harry said, and Louis rolled his eyes. "You would've done it by now." Louis said, and Harry scoffed. "How do you know that?" Harry spat, and it was Louis' turn to scoff.

"We've been- I mean we were together for almost five years. I know you too well." Louis said, and Harry kept quiet because Louis had a point. Harry's silence just proved to Louis that he was right, because he knew Harry better than Harry knew himself.

"How about this; the next town we get to, we both go our separate ways. You can steal a car or whatever, and then we never have to see each other ever again?" Harry said, and Louis didn't want to go along with it. He didn't want to lose him, because he'd rather kill himself than lose Harry.

"Yes." Louis dead panned, his voice monotone. "Good, the next town is about a few hours away, which means I won't be stuck with you for any longer." Harry said, giving Louis a shit eating grin, to which Louis just ignored and rested his head against the window, a few silent tears rolling down his cheek.

 ▲

"So, in the morning I'll be gone." Louis said, sitting on the floor. They had reached a fairly decent sized town, and where staying in a hotel for their last night together. "Good. Don't bother waking me up if I'm asleep. I don't want to see your face." Harry said, staring at the ceiling.

"And you say I'm the asshole," Louis muttered, and Harry let out a dry laugh. "We're both assholes, Louis. I at least have a nice side while you don't." Harry said, sitting up and looking at him. "I'm going to kill myself tomorrow." Louis said, and Harry rolled his eyes.

"Why not do it now?" Harry said, and Louis started crying then. "You don't get it!" Louis shouted, standing up. "Oh wow, it has emotions! That's news to me!" Harry exclaimed sarcastically, and Louis wiped at the tears.

"I hoped, that if I told you I'd kill myself you'd forgive me! Or maybe you'd even love me again, but goddammit, Harry, if I don't have you I'd rather be dead!" Louis screamed, his voice cracking. Harry just shook his head and stood up, grabbing his bag.

He pulled a pistol out from it and tossed it to Louis. "There's two bullets. One for you, one for me." Harry said, his tone emotionless. "W-what?" Louis asked in shock, staring at the gun in his hands. "You're not the only one that wants to die." Harry said, pulling his sleeve up and showing what was left of the tattoo.

You could faintly see Louis' name on his wrists, burns, cuts, and scars covering most of it. "Now, put the gun to your head, and pull the trigger." Harry said, pulling the sleeve back down. "No." Louis said, and Harry grabbed the gun from Louis.

"Fine, I will then." Harry said before kissing Louis and putting the gun to his head. Harry pulled away and Louis noticed he was crying. "I love you." Harry said, and at the last second he put the gun to his own head and pulled the trigger.

Louis let out a pained cry as he stared at Harry's lifeless body, the tears blurring his vision as he fell to the ground and felt around for the gun. Louis put the barrel of the gun against his temple. "I love you, too." Louis said and pulled the trigger. As the life left his lungs, the last thing he saw was Harry.

The end...

[a/n]

PLEASE DON'T BE MAD AT ME FOR ENDING IT THAT WAY. I had the ending planned out since the beginning, and no I'm not going to change it. They're dead now. I will delete any comments saying that you hate me for how I ended my own fucking story. There's going to be an epilogue and that's it for Louis and Harry. The third book should be up in about a week.  The series is almost over and now I'm sad :( I probably made everyone sad now, too. Anyway, I'm Ocaen, go fuck yourself.

Song - Deathbeds - Bring Me The Horizon

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