creek

1

~Tweek~
I open my eyes slowly letting them adjust to the darkness surrounding my bed. I reach out into the darkness onto my bedside table and grab for my flask, containing a small dribble of coffee from my parents coffee shop. The coffee was stone cold, its sour taste had become a normal sensation for me. I placed my flask back on my night stand and reached out with shaky hands to get my phone of the wooden table, the bright light was a shock to my eyes making the screen appear blurry like I had been crying. The time glowed on the screen, 3:47am , to be honest it wasn't as early as I had expected , it was a little over an hour since the last time I had woken up at 2:30. Proud I decided that I had slept enough for tonight. Besides what was the point in just lying in bed for another few hours just to fall asleep a few minuets before I needed to get out of bed anyway. I clumsily flop out of bed a couple of disorientated squeaks escape my mouth as I knock over my lamp. Oh Jesus what if someone hears me o god my parents are gonna skin me alive. Oh I remember my parents haven't came home yet they are still away at a meeting about the opening hours of the coffee shop or the staff or something. Oh god they aren't home yet they must have been murdered and stabbed and killed until they are dead. Oh Jesus the last thing I said was "Gah, to MucH pressurE!!!!?" I didn't even tell them I loved them and now they are dead and I didn't say goodbye.

Oh I remember they said they were going to stay at my granddad's for the night because it was a long drive, Ok I can calm down now , breath. I go get some coffee the corridor is dark, I stumble a few steps forward and hit the light switch on, and wait until its time for school.

7:45am
The clock beeps to wake me, lucky me u was already up I had been since like 3 or 4 or something. I was still in the clothes I had been wearing yesterday. I was going to put on pyjamas but then I panicked that something might be watching, I guess it was stupid but changing now would be too much pressure and I might be late. I brush my teeth though and pat my static blond hair down And head to hell/ high school, at 15 years old I'm quite a mess to be honest, I can't even button up a shirt without messing up. That's fine though, its always been like that and I don't think it will change any time soon.
I fill up my flask with hot coffee, I add some sugar today I don't know why, don't ask me why, I just decided it was a good idea.
I arrive in school and wander towards my locker, I can feel their eyes watching me observing my every move, it just adds to my shaking and stuttering. I pull my locker open and a few sheets of paper come falling out, the corridors are noisy and crowded. Secretly I know they can't all be staring at me but it still feels that way, they are probably doing there own thing, this nonage doesn't stop my stomach flipping inside me and my hands going cold, it doesn't stop the breaths coming out shaky and they anxiety rising up my throat. Its not the end of the world, its always been like this, I guess its just my personality, like its my secret role in society. My role is to be an awkward spaz it makes other people feel less insecure, if there's someone like me to compare themselves to. I would like to say I don't mind but that's not really true.