made to love you

Can't do it.

    Samantha yawned and slumped on the closest chair nearby. It has been a hectic day. Who would have thought court proceedings would take forever. Why can't the court understand that a child needs its mother and Kabeer was a sucker of a father. Oh how I hate these courts and the gibberish they hand out. "Welcome home mummy" Zach my five year old son said. That was what brought me back from my zoning out. I turned to see him holding a glass of water. So sweet. My little boy. My bundle of joy. If there was one thing I did right with kabeer is having Zach. He came and sat next to me handing me the glass. I hugged him very tight. Nina his nanny came out to welcome me. What would I have done with out her.? She is like a second mother to him.
   "How did the proceedings go? " Nina asked as she collected the empty glass from my hands and picked up Zach from my laps. She is so concerned about my welfare. That is one more reason why I care about Nina. It was okay but its still slow. How long does it take to get a verdict? This is a simple case. When you look at kabeer you would know he is not capable of taking care of himself not to think of an extra responsibility called a kid!
   Anyway keep your boring outside life out and have dinner with this handsome young man so he can get ready to go to bed. She said as she stood up and went towards the direction of the dining room.
  I joined them in the dining room, where Nina had set the table for two. Me and Zach. She always likes giving us alone time. I forgot to tell you, Nina is also our chef. A responsibility she takes seriously. She prepared a simply meal of pasta and vegetables with lots of fruits to go with it. The pasta is for Zach alone. I usually eat lots of veggies and fruits. Trying to watch my weight. I pulled my seat and sat close to Zach and pulled his plate with pasta and veggies. He is so weird ,he eats his pasta with bananas." Mama my teacher said its good we eat balanced diet at all times but you don't do it. You always eat veggies and fruits. Why?" Because Mama is already old and Zach is the one that needs to grow as big as Mama. I answered.  Then when Zach is older he would also take only fruits and veggies like mama, but I hate cooked carrots and that's the only veggies Nina gives me everyday. Mama can you tell her to stop giving me veggies? I looked up at him and smiled. Before I could answer him, he asked Mama is pizza and ice cream a balanced diet? No Zach it cant be. Yes it is mama. A pizza is made with flour it has bacon and veggies and oil and...... I took up my hands in surrender. I do agree I think pizza is a balanced diet. He smiled and said. Mama then I would be having pizza and ice cream everyday. He clapped his hands.Kids nowadays are so smart.
  As I sat on the table my mind was elsewhere thinking about the court case. And all my time and money it took to go but I continued fighting because I loved my son with my whole heart.  What Kabeer wants its something that I can't and would never do. No mother would want their kid growing up with a drug addict for a father. He has gone to rehab twice but he is not willing to change. I took the easy way out and filed for divorce. I can hear some of you saying a marriage is for better for worse in sickness and in health till death do us part. Its easier said if you are not at the receiving end of Kabeer. But when you go through hell you forget about your vows and think about your survival and what is best for your kid. If Zach grows up in this environment what would he become? Sometimes I think Kabeer is a lost cause. If we stick with him my son would grow up like him. That would be every mother's nightmare.
   "Mama you are staring at your food and you are crying. Mama is sad. Zach would give mama a big hug and she would smile". He said and brought me out of my reverie. I hugged him and called Nina to clear the table. Mama is not crying Sweetheart. Then why is there tears in mamas eyes? Mama is sad then he said. No sweetheart. Mama is just thinking what a lovely sweetheart mama has and i tickled him. He giggled and was trying to tickle me also. Zachary loves mama very much he said. I pecked him on his forehead and told him I also love him so much. He hugged me . This is my happiness. She took him to have his bath and get ready for bed. I cleared the table and did the dishes. Oops here I am I forgot to tell you who I am thinking you ought to know me.
    I took my handbag to my room and stripped my clothes and put on my shorts and a hank top locked my room. This is how I get the perfect body my friends and colleagues are envious of. No one has ever seen me in a gym but I have the perfect abs. How do I do it? I do an hour of exercise in the morning and another hour in the evenings and another hour if I am pissed off. I put on my favorite song that I listen to when I am doing my exercises. Na na by TreySongz. By the way I am Samantha Salim. I am 24 years old. I am a programmer. I love computer its something that does not judge you and you can ask it anything and it would tell you. That brings us to another hobby of mine.......