Queer

    There was once a girl named Evelyn rose. She was the youngest in her family with three older sisters and two older brothers who her parents constantly compared her to. Her parents constantly betrayed her about her incompetency and nothing Evelyn did was ever seen as an accomplishment in their eyes. On top of ruining Evelyn's self-esteem and self-worth, her parents took every opportunity they could to shower her older siblings with praises and affection. Whenever Evelyn was in the vicinity of her parents, their smiles turned to grimacing scowls and their eyes came faintly with disappointment and hate as they picked out her every flaw and spat upon anything she enjoyed or excelled on. At school, Evelyn was ignored, shunned, and unwanted. Left alone, her only friend was a small piece of metal that was rectangular and stained dark reddish-brown along one edge. The few who acknowledged her existence thought her to be odd, and abnormal. They called her names like "dyke", "trash", "a waste of space." The teachers acted as if Evelyn didn't exist and thus never tried to help her escape from the constant cycle of hate and abuse.

As the years slowly slipped by, Evelyn began to believe that she was what everyone said and began to slip into the pit of depression and self-hate. She began to feel like she was incapable of being loved or cared for because she was too fucked up. She'd been hurt by so many people who pretended to be friends with her, only to abandon her in the end, that she gave up on making any. Evelyn didn't really know what was keeping her going for she couldn't think of a single living soul that ever showed her an ounce of affection. She started to feel unnecessary and burden-like almost everywhere she went, except the old abandoned forest behind her house which served as her safe haven and the only place she could call home. There she was protected from the harshness of the world around her and saved from the harsh judgement and rude comments that she was subjected to on a daily basis. The cool breeze of the wind, the lingering smell of lavender, the fish splashing around in the clear lake, the whispering of the trees swaying in the wind were all therapeutic to her and helped to calm her down when she feels as if her whole life was tearing at the seams and her mind and soul was being ripped to pieces both mentally and physically.

Evelyn often drew beautiful artworks, but her drawings were different from what one would usually expect. The art was displayed on her skin, and instead of paintbrushes she used her stained silver razor, and instead of paint she used her blood. She used her blood to make beautiful designs on her arms and legs, but too bad no one ever saw her beautiful artwork. Until one day she decided that enough was enough, she couldn't handle this torturous life anymore, and as she sat in her special place she held a bottle of medication in her pale trembling hand and barely managed to get the lid of as her vision was blurry. Tears were streaming down her face, smearing the blood that was painstakingly painted onto her cheeks, as all she can think about was how much better her family's life will be without her, if they even noticed that she was missing. She absentmindedly wondered if her school would even make an announcement about her or just continuing acting as if she doesn't exist.  Slowly she poured all the pills into her hand, and began to count them all. 1,2,3...11,12,13... 'Perfect,' she thought to herself and slowly tilted her head back. She put all of the pills into her mouth and took a gulp of water and then slowly she started getting dizzy. Her body could not take the abuse from all the pills and wanted to expel them, but she managed to hold all the pills down until everything just went, black.