Say My Name

Un-load The Boxes and the Sob Stories

I was out of breath as I dragged the last box in with my non-injured left hand even though it was supposed to have a crutch under it. The entire right side of my body was damaged and hurt really bad. I needed a crutch to help me support my injured right leg. Mark sighed heavily behind me. "I told you I'd get it. You need to rest Jack!" I rolled my eyes.

"Nah, I'm fine. Look, I don't even need the crutch anymore." I stood tall and proud on both of my legs but my right leg quickly started to shake and I fell. Mark ran and caught me before I hit the floor. I started chuckling "Okay, so maybe I do still need the crutch." Mark picked me up bridal style and carried me into the living room, the only room not filled with boxes of my stuff. I blushed as he put me down and kissed my cheek. Ever since we left the hospital Mark always had a worried look in his eyes, I could tell he wanted to know what happened, how it all happened. WHY it all happened. And a part of me honestly wanted to tell him, but I didn't want to bore him with my past but most of all, I didn't want to face my past, I didn't want to remember it. Yet it was unfair to keep Mark in the dark about it. He was, in fact, my boyfriend and he should know more about me if he wanted to. "Mark...sit down...I need to tell you my sob story if you want to hear it. It's why all of this-" I motioned to my injuries "happened."

"Jack, you don't have to tell me if you aren't ready. I completely understand," God he was so sweet and perfect in every way!

"Just sit down ya bloaf and listen will ya? I know that you want to know more about me, well....here it is if you'll just sit down and let me talk," Mark quickly sat down across from me. He had been so cautious of every touch between us as to not hurt me. "It all started wayy back in Ireland. I lived in two different houses, one in the city, and then in a cabin in the middle of nowhere that was trapped in woods. Well, back when I lived in the city it was my Dad, Mom, my big sister Margret, my little brother Sam, and me. My sister is a few years older than me and Sam was just a year younger than me so him and I were really close. When we both went to middle school together we became inseparable, no one got between us. That was until we met Scott. He was a new kid in class with us and we wanted to welcome him. We quickly became great friends and an inseparable trio. One day...."

I started tearing up, even now, nearly 20 years later, I still couldn't talk about it without crying like a little bitch. Mark grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly. "One day, we were spending the night at his house for a big sleepover. He lived up on a mountain and we were playing outside, enjoying the nice weather and the gorgeous view! We were playing tag when..." I started bawling. "Scott went to tag Sam and he pushed Sam off the edge of a cliff in the mountain. I tried to catch him" I tried to look at Mark but my eyes were so full of tears that all I saw was a blur. "Sam rolled down the mountain, breaking his neck against a rock and died." I put my face into my hands and cried harder. "I tried to catch him Mark! I really did!"

Mark wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. I buried my face in his shirt and just continued to cry. Mark stroked my hair and shushed me. "I know you tried Jack, it's not your fault." He said quietly into my ear. I knew it wasn't my fault but I couldn't help but feel it was.

"He was my brother and it was my job to protect him and I didn't." I sobbed a little softer into his shirt. Even though I was a mess talking about this, Mark was very good at calming me down and making me feel better. He ran his fingers through my hair, careful of the bump on my head from getting knocked out at the hotel. "Sam's the reason why I'm so terrified of heights. I always flash back to that horrible day. It's also the reason I have Anti. I hated Scott so badly for pushing Sam that a whole new side of me formed. Anti became a part of me and he ended up beating Scott so badly the next time I saw him that Scott ended up with a concussion and never remembered anything. His family then moved away so I could never remind him of what happened. After the funeral my family moved as well to get away from all that reminded us of Sam. I went to a new high school where Scott and I met yet again. I hated him with every ounce of my being and all he felt for me was what he called "love." He never did remember what happened but that doesn't mean that I forgot. He ended up stalking me and wouldn't leave me alone until my parents got new jobs here in America so we moved. I was MORE than happy to get away! Until he found me somehow at the hotel. He tortured me for revenge for never loving him back and for moving away."