scarlet heart

1

It is now the height of summer, and the green color in front of me feels downcast, unlike the fresh green of early spring that signified that the good days were just beginning and made everything feel bright and cheerful. It could be because I know the season’s splendour has already reached its peak and what lies ahead is only a steady deterioration.

This feeling of melancholy is the same as how I feel now. It’s already the tenth day since I’ve been here in ancient times, but I still feel as if it is all just a dream. I feel like I am only waiting to awake up in modern times and am not really in the forty-third year of Kangxi’s reign1. I’m still that twenty five year old, single, white collar professional, Zhang Xiao and not this thirteen year old Manchurian girl, Maertai Ruoxi. Ten days ago, after I got off work, I did not pay attention to the traffic as I crossed the road. By the time I heard the crowd’s screams, it was too late. I felt myself flying towards the sky, yet I could see the physical half of my body still dangling from the truck. In the midst of terror and intense pain, I lost consciousness, and when I awoke again, I was already on the bed of this body’s previous owner. 

According to the servant girls, I had fallen down the stairs to the loft and was unconscious for a full day and night. As for this “condition” where I lost all my memories upon awakening, the doctor said this was due to excessive shock and with careful nurturing I would slowly recover. 

After walking only a short while, sweat can already be seen on my forehead. Next to me, jie-jie’s2

maidservant, Qiaohui, whom jie-jie had brought with her from home when she married, urges me, “Second Miss, let’s go back. Even though it is past noon, the heat from the ground at this time is the most harmful. Your body still hasn’t fully recovered yet.”

I answer her acquiescently, “Alright. Jie-jie should be done reciting her Buddhist scriptures by now anyway.”

My name is now Maertai Ruoxi and this older sister I acquired is Maertai Ruolan, the second wife3 of a rather well-known figure in Qing history: Prince Lian4, also known as the Eighth-prince5, Yunsi. Currently however, the Eighth-prince still has not been bestowed the title of ‘Prince’ and is only a ‘Duo’luo’bei’le’6. Furthermore, he has not yet forced to change his name to avoid taboo against Emperor Yongzheng’s name, so he should still be called Yinsi7.

If one puts it nicely, jie-jie’s nature can be said to be gentle and virtuous, and if put not so nicely, she is weak and unwillingly to strive for anything. In an entire day, she spends at least half of it doing nothing but recite Buddhist scriptures. I suspect she is not very favoured. At least, in the ten days that I have been here, I have never heard of the Eighth-prince coming to see her. However, based on these ten days, I can also tell she is very caring towards her younger sister. From food and drink to clothing, nothing is too big or small for her to think about, for fear that I would be uncomfortable. I sigh silently. If I am unable to go back, then in this place and age, she is the only person I can depend on, but as I think about Eighth-prince’s fate in the future, I feel that this support is not that reliable. However, that is still many years in the future, and I cannot worry about it for now.

Sure enough, when I return to the house, jie-jie is already there and is sitting by the table eating some refreshments. As she sees me entering the house, she says in a light scolding tone, “You didn’t even think about the heat beating down on your head.” 

I walk forward and sit down beside her. With a smile, I answer, “I’m not that delicate. Besides, after going out for a little stroll, my body actually feels less heavy than it did a few days ago.”

Examining me carefully, she says, “Your complexion does look a little better. But right now, the heat is the deadliest. Don’t go outside again at this hour.”