Damages

Escape.

I shut the door quietly behind me. I tried not to make a sound as I passed through the doorway to the kitchen. I looked for any sign that he was home. If he wasn't, it was time. I checked every room in the house to make sure he wasn't home. I breathed a sigh of relief at not having found him.
"I've got to be quick." I thought to myself.
Everything had fallen into place. After 4 years of being in an abusive relationship I was finally getting out. The job that I had applied to months back became my getaway. All I had to do was leave before he could stop me. I ran upstairs and began throwing all my belongings into my suitcase. As I shoved my entire closet into a bag I heard the sound I dreaded the most. The door. I quickly shoved the entire case under the bed and shut the cabinet drawers. It was 6:00. He was home early. I ran downstairs.
He was standing at the foot of the stairs looking up at me. The sight of him disgusted me.
"Why do you look like you've seen a ghost?"
I tried to calm myself down. He could smell fear.
"I...didn't expect you home so early. I haven't even had time to make dinner." I rushed past him into the kitchen before he had the chance to say anything else. I pulled several pans out and started a pot of water. He came in shortly after.
"What are you making?" He asked.
"Spaghetti."
I heard an annoyed sigh escape his throat. I was never a good cook, he hated everything I made.
Sometimes he hated it so much he'd hit me.
I remembered one time I burnt the casserole, and he held my hand to the stove while the fire was on.
"Well you don't have to worry about making anything for dinner tomorrow night. It's going to be a long night at the office. Bloody banks all backed up, I have to do payrolls for the whole office all over again. Tosssers." He spat. My ears perked up.
He would be gone all day tomorrow. I had gotten lucky. It was my time. I tried to hide my excitement.
He came over as I was adding the sauce to the pasta.
With one swift movement of his hand, my lip was split open. His hand came crashing into my face so fast I hardly had time to understand the cause.
"Fucking whore. How many times do I have to tell you I hate marina sauce!" He yelled.
I cowered as I muttered "How else am I supposed to make spaghetti...why didn't you say something earlier?" Without warning , the back of his hand collided with the side of my face again. I felt his ring hit my eye. Another swift blow was sent directly to my nose.  I fell to the floor, gasping for air.
He crouched down in front of me.
"Don't ever disrespect me like that again. Pick yourself up, fucking pig." He spit at me as he walked out of the room. I picked myself up, and walked to the fridge. A homemade ice pack would have to do.
I dumped all of the pasta into the trash. I wasn't hungry. If he wanted something, he'd have to make it himself. As I sat with the ice pack to my face, I planned my escape. If everything went as planned...I would be a free woman. I heard the TV on upstairs, which meant he wouldn't be able to hear me if I made a phone call. I quickly dialled the number of my new employer. She picked up instantly.
"Violet! So glad you called, I was meaning to get in touch before tomorrow." She said cheerfully.
"Hi Lisa, I was just calling to get some more information on where I'm to meet you tomorrow?"
"Of course, of course! So as you know, you've been hired as a full time stylist for a band, they're about to go on tour starting tomorrow. You'll be handling everything from stage looks, to photo shoots, to meet and greets. The first few shows are here in London. So tomorrow, I'll need you to meet me in the 02 Arena at 4 pm. We'll get you all settled in your hotel room, so make sure you have all the things you're going to need for the next 6 months. Any other questions?" She piped up.
"Eh yeah... who's the band? And do I need to bring makeup for them?"
A hearty laugh escaped her lips.
"Oh no, no! They won't need any makeup really, you'll be here for hair and wardrobe mainly, unless they've got a blemish of sorts. I'm sure you've heard of them, One Direction?"
I racked my brain. The name sounded oddly familiar but I couldn't put faces with the name. And I was just finding out that it was a boy band. Here I was thinking I'd be doing girls makeup all day.
"Oh... yeah... I think I know them."
"Splendid, splendid," I noticed she repeated herself often, "So when you get here tomorrow we'll make all the proper introductions and you'll get right to work! I do look forward to meeting you in person Miss Jones. How do you prefer I call you?"
"Just violet."
"Alright well I'll see you tomorrow Violet. And thank you again for taking this job, you saved our asses!"
I hung up the phone and shoved it in my pocket.
I was a little worried about working with boys, but a job was a job. And this one was my ticket out of hell.
I had already quit my current job as a waitress so everything was landing on this.I would have taken any job if it had promised to get me away from Richard. I slowly walked upstairs and into the bedroom. As usual, he was sitting on the bed in his underwear watching the TV. I ignored him and  shut the door to the bathroom so I could bathe.
I ran a hot bath, and hopped in. There was so much on my mind. As I soaked I thought about how much things had changed. When I first met Richard he was so sweet...I could never have anticipated the stark change that occurred in our relationship. Gradually he had become more and more bitter. The first time he hit me he fell to the floor crying and promised he'd never do it again. And I believed him.
Months later I had lost all of my friends, and even my parents because of him. None of them could bare to be around him, and therefore me. They couldn't understand why I didn't leave him. And neither did I. My whole heart wanted to believe that he could get better. But I was blind. Every time he hit me, he came to me several hours later with an apologetic speech about how stressed he was and how much he loved me. I almost had it memorised. He had turned me into such a cold, hateful person. I had tried several times to commit suicide, and when I wasn't trying I was finding other ways to punish myself.
Every time he found a cut on my arm he hit me. He'd always say he didn't want to be seen with a psychotic whore. The more he hit me, the harder I worked to hide it. That's actually how I got into makeup. I got so good, I could cover up any cut or bruise he gave me. So when I saw an urgent job positing for a stylist I answered it. I was surprised when I got it because truthfully I didn't have much experience, but I was eager. I guess that's what won them over.
A knock on the door woke me from my daydream.
Richard stepped through the door. I loathed not having locks on the doors. He had changed all the handles several months before when I tried to kill myself. "Hey pumpkin... how are you doing?"
His sickeningly fake voice made me cringe. Every fibre of my being wanted to choke.
"Fine." I said quietly.
He kneeled by the tub, running his hand along my face. I winced as it grazed over the sore skin.
"You know I love you right?" He whispered.
I willed myself not to hit him.
"Of course." I lied.
"Good. Let's Try not to have any more mishaps alright? You know I don't like correcting you."
Correcting me. That was his word for beating me.
I suppose if I was an abusive psychopath, id want to idealise it as well. I nodded slowly.
He leaned over and kissed my forehead.
I forced myself to smile as he left the room.
That's it. Tomorrow was the end of my suffering.
____________________________________
I woke up the next morning the same time I always did. I wasn't going to work; he just had to think I was. He woke up as I was about to leave.
"Have a great day love." He yawned.
"Oh I will." I said with a smile.
I went downstairs and hopped in my car. Instead of going to work I went straight to the bank.
A couple months back I had found Richards laptop open to his bank accounts. So without his knowledge I put my name on all his accounts. I entered the bank, and walked up to the teller and said "Hello, I'd like to make a transfer."
He asked me my name, and checked the accounts.
"And how much would you like to transfer ma'am?"
"Everything. My boyfriend and I are draining these accounts to create a separate trust fund."
I couldn't tell if he knew I was lying. I hoped not.
"Alright, let me transfer that for you." He said again.
Now not only was I going to leave his abusive ass, but I was taking his entire life savings with me. From there I headed to the Verizon store to cancel my phone. I was getting an entire new account and phone number. No traces would be left.
When I got back in the car and headed home I knew he would be gone already. I ran inside and slid my luggage out from under the bed. I began reorganising it so that everything fit. I was going to need a lot of clothes. I laughed to myself.
"Thanks Richard, your trust fund and life savings really is going to help me out."
I began gathering my belongings from all over the house. I wasn't taking everything. Just the things that mattered. While I was gathering my photos I noticed the framed picture of Richard and I from two christmases ago. I took the frame, and smashed it. I started destroying everything.
Not only would I be gone, but all of our "memories" would be as well. He was going to be furious.
All of his favourite shirts, I cut holes in them.
The pictures of him when he was a kid, I ripped them. And every last thing he loved in the house was destroyed. As I sat back and looked at the mess I wondered if I was being petty. But then I reminded myself. Any man that treats me the way Richard treated me deserved 10 fold what I had done.
Once everything had been packed I shoved it all in my car. I took one last look at the house, and left.
____________________________________
I was anxious the whole drive. If a car followed me for more than a few minutes I assumed it was Richard. I kept panicking for nothing. I was so afraid he had come home early and found me gone. I wondered if he'd be mad I had left, or happy to be rid of me. As I drove I wondered what it was going to be like going on tour with a band. I was less than enthused to be with a group of guys, but a job was a job and I knew I shouldn't complain. I hoped that I wouldn't have to spend a lot of time with them. They were probably all tosssers anyway. I had read over the list of countries we would be traveling to. The list was so long. We were to start in the UK, work our way all across Europe, then to the United States and on from there. They were hitting almost every continent. A band that big would surely mean they were pompous ass holes. I just wanted to get away from my normal life. There was no home for me. Hopefully I could find one somewhere along the way. About an hour outside of London I stopped at a small diner. I sat in the car doing my makeup before I went in. I was used to people staring at me when my face was badly beaten, but it was time to forget that. I never wanted to cover up another wound ever again. I dabbed foundation onto my swollen eye and bruised nose. The cut in my lip was harder to cover but I hid it well with lipstick.
"There," I said "Just a normal looking girl."
After I ate I got on the road again. I had made really good time. It was nearly 4 when I arrived at the 02. When I parked a man came over to my car. "Violet jones?" He asked. His beard made him look tough.
"Yeah...that's me." I replied.
"Good, Lisa's right inside. I'll walk you in." He said.
"Ehm thanks... who are you?" I asked.
"Oh sorry, My names Paul. I'm one of the Boys' bodyguards. Nice to meet you." He seemed nice. But as usual, I didn't trust him yet. Anyone could fuck you over at any time. He walked me inside to a back room where a woman sat at a table in front of a long mirror. As soon as I walked in she jumped up.
"Oh Violet how wonderful! You're quite sharp on time I must say." She gawked.
"Haha, yeah I guess I am." I tried to smile.
"Alright, were gonna have a driver take all of your belongings over to the hotel. Your stuff will be in your room when you get back tonight. Okay you stay here and familiarise yourself with everything. The boys will be in in a minute." She said as she left.
I looked in all the drawers. There was everything from makeup, to hair spray , to cologne, and everything in between. In the back of the room was a large closet filled with racks of clothing. I browsed it casually to see what kind of clothes they wore.
"Typical." I said pulling out a pair of ripped skinny jeans. Before I knew it I heard the door open behind me. I walked out to find a group of 4 boys standing in front of me. They looked familiar but I would never have known who they were.
The shortest one with blonde hair stepped up to me.
"So nice to meet ya viola, glad to have you with us, my names Niall." He said in a quirky Irish accent.
"It's Violet." I snapped.
"Excuse him, he's not the brightest on account of all the brain cells he loses drinking Guiness everyday. I'm Louis, the smart, handsome, and funny one." The Blonde one slapped him on the arm. I nodded quietly trying to avoid rolling my eyes.
"Ignore both of them. They get hyper before shows. My names Liam, and I hope you'll enjoy coming on tour with us. I'm sure we'll enjoy your company."
He seemed nice, but it was probably all a facade.
"Nice to meet you." I replied.
The last one stepped up and shook my hand.
"I'm Zayn. Lovely to meet you." He said quietly.
He seemed a little more grounded than all the others. I still had to process everything.
"So now that we've all met-"
"No you still haven't met Harry." Louis said.
"Who?" I asked as my eyes narrowed.
"Me." A voice said from behind me.
I spun on my heels to find a tall, curly headed boy standing behind me. I glared at him.
"I'm Harry. Sorry, was grabbing a water bottle for you in case you're thirsty." He handed me the water.
I took it cautiously. "Oh, thank you."
Why was he sucking up to me?
He smiled at me so confidently. "Of course Love."
My glance was unwavering. As was his.
He was one of the first people to keep eye contact with me when I was glaring . Most people looked away as if I scared them.
"Don't call me that." I said after a minute of silence.
"Oh I'm sorry, do you prefer Violet?"
"Yes." I said walking away from him.
We all stood there for a bit, unsure what to say.
"Well we've got several hours until we have to start getting ready. We're going out for a bite, would you like to come with?" Liam asked.
"No thanks. I ate earlier."
Truth is I was hungry but I didn't want to spend any unnecessary time with them.
"Lisa said she'd like us to get to know you. Why don't you come even if you're not hungry?" Zayn asked.
"Fine. But just because she asked me to."
I was going to keep my guard up until they proved to me I could trust them. I didn't care if I was being a bitch. No one earned my trust that easily.
"Alright let's go then." Niall said smiling.
____________________________________
The ride to the restaurant was pretty quiet. They had all decided on poppies, one of my least favourite places to eat. We were traveling in a large
Black van with tinted windows. I was sitting in the third row with Liam. His silence wasn't awkward, it was actually somewhat reassuring.
At one point during the drive he asked "So where are you from?" I kept facing out the window.
"Manchester. Born and raised."
"That's lovely. Do you like it there?"
"No. I loathe it."
by this point the other boys had quieted down to hear our conversation.
"Have family there, a boyfriend?"
"No." I snapped.
I looked back at him angrily. Why was he prying?
"I'm sorry... I hope I haven't offended you. Just trying to find out more about you."
"And why would you want to do that?"
"Why wouldn't I?"
A slight smile spread across his face.
I hadn't shut him up. I was surprised. I was being quite rude, yet he seemed unfazed. It shocked me.
"I'm not the type of person people enjoy getting to know." I laughed. Louis turned around.
"Whys that?" He asked.
"Just give it time. You'll see." I said.
They were quiet after that. I had made things more awkward than they already were.
"Stop being a fucking prick violet." I thought to myself. But it was so hard to open up.
I took out my pack of cigarettes and lit one.
"If you're going to smoke in here, you have to at least share." Louis smirked.
I flipped open the lid and offered him one. Zayn took one as well. "Can I bum a light?" He asked.
I tossed them my lighter. I usually smoked alone so it was kind of nice to see other people accompanying me, but I still liked the solitude of smoking alone.
I had picked up the habit when Richard first started hitting me. I wanted to stop, but it was the only thing that took the edge off. Calmed my nerves.
When we got to the restaurant everyone hesitated on where to sit. It looked as if no one really wanted to sit next to me. It was my own fault.
But as soon as I sat down, Harry sat on one side, and Niall on the other. I glanced back and forth at both of them. They were both smiling at me.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing. It's just nice to have a girl around. It's usually just us boys." Niall laughed.
They glanced over the menus while goofing around.
They seemed to be good friends.
The waiter came over soon.
"Alright what's everyone having?"
One by one he took everyone's orders. When he got to me I declined. "No thanks."
But as I handed him my menu Harry said "She'll have the fish and chips." The waiter wrote it down and walked away. I turned to him angrily.
"Why did you do that? I said I wasn't hungry."
"I know you did. But your stomach said otherwise. I heard it growling the whole way up here." He laughed. I was irritated with how nice he was being.
Men were only nice when they wanted something.
But I was still being rude. "...Thanks." I mumbled.
"Of course." He said happily.
I was going to be nice if it killed me. They'd done nothing to deserve such attitude from me.
"So... where are you all from?" I asked cordially.
One by one they answered.
"Bradford, Wolverhampton, Mullingar, Doncaster, Cheshire." I nodded.
"How did you all meet?"
They all smiled. "X Factor. That's how we became a band." Louis smiled.
We chatted lightly as we ate. They told me more about the tour and their music. One thing I found pleasantly surprising was that they didn't seem to mind me not knowing who they were.
Though I didn't trust them, or particularly like them yet, I had to acknowledge that they were not cocky at all like I had predicted.
____________________________________
When we got back to the Arena it was time to start getting them ready. They each sat down in chairs along the table.  It was going to be hard styling 5 people at one time. But I could do it.
"Okay... why don't you all tell me how you like your hair done?" I asked.
Liam and Niall required the least amount of effort on their hair. They both had a similar short hairstyle that only needed a bit of brushing and hair spray.
Harry, Louis, and Zayn all had longer hair that they liked a certain way. As I worked quickly on Niall and Liam, the other boys picked out their outfits.
"Do you like to match?" I asked.
"NO." They all said at once.
"Alright...Christ." I said.
"Sorry...we've had people try to put us in the same outfits and it just doesn't work. We have our own styles, but we like to look cohesive." Liam said.
I nodded and went about my work.
They all modelled several outfits asking for my opinion. "Give me a minute." Said to Liam while walking over to Zayn who looked confused.
"What's the problem?" I asked.
"I don't like how this looks...it's too clean." He said.
"What are you going for?"
"Rugged...dangerous." He replied.
I laughed a bit. "Ok strip down again." I demanded.
He took the clothes off and hung them up. Now him , Liam, and Harry all stood in their underwear. I tried not to stare. It was odd seeing boys in their underwear. I wasn't used to it. They were handsome as much as I hated to admit it.
"Here." I handed Zayn a plain black shirt, ripped jeans, a leather jacket, and black boots. "Try this on and let me know if it's edgy enough for you." They all laughed a bit. I picked Louis' outfit quickly.
"Give this a try." I said. It would look good on him. It was a white shirt with a plaid lined jacket.
"Anything in particular you're going for?" I asked Harry as he stood next to me in his boxer briefs.
"Nope. Just Harry." He said.
"Well, i don't know you well enough to understand what that looks like." I said.
"Guess we're going to have to fix that."
He was so cheeky. I was trying to ignore it.
"Okay... here." I said giving him a Black T shirt, black skinny jeans, and a pair of cream coloured Chelsea boots.
"Looks like you know me better than you thought." He said walking off. I shook my head and went back to styling Liam and Niall. I used a round brush to get the "swoop" effect they both desired. I sprayed them heavily with hairspray before letting them inspect it.
"Is that alright?" I asked.
"Perfect, thanks love!"  Niall cheered.
I raised an eyebrow. He laughed a bit.
"Oh, sorry. Violet. Thank you." He was blushing. I nodded. Liam was satisfied with his as well.
I got the two of them dressed before starting on the other boys hair. It was odd standing so close to them. I felt like I had no personal space.
I had learned that Louis and Zayn also liked similar hair styles. Their hair was long enough to spike up.
When I was done with them I moved onto Harry.
His seemed to be the most difficult.
"How often do you wash it?" I asked.
"Maybe three times a week. I use dry shampoo instead. Keeps it from getting frizzy." He responded.
"Alright. I'll keep it to the left since you seem to push it that way anyways." I said.
"Thanks, that's how I like it." I ran my fingers through his hair while spraying it thoroughly. It was so odd to be running my hands through another guys hair. If I wouldn't have known better I'd have said he was enjoying it. Once they were all done I stepped back. They looked like a group, just like they'd asked.
"I'm going to take your picture, get together."
"Aww is this going to be your new wallpaper?" Louis teased. I rolled my eyes.
"No, I'm keeping it for future reference. Styling 5 guys at once isn't easy you know." I sneered.
They stood together and I took a picture.

Shortly after they were called to stage. About half an hour in I requested to be taken to the hotel. I had enough excitement for one day. I needed to be alone. A driver took me back to the hotel. I showered and dressed in my pyjamas. This was the first night in several years that I'd be sleeping alone. A couple hours had passed and I was nearly ready for bed. I grabbed my cigarettes and a jacket and walked to the back staircase of the hotel. Smoking wasn't allowed inside so I had to sit in the cold. But I didn't mind. As I sat enjoying my smoke I saw a large bus pull up. One by one they all stepped off the bus. I didn't know they'd be back so soon.
As they approached me , a little voice panicked in the back of my head. I had washed all my makeup off.
"Fuck." I whispered under my breath.
They all stopped in front of me.
"Violet?" Liam asked with a worried expression.
"Yeah.. that's me." I said trying to pretend I didn't look like someone's punching bag. I was laughing to keep them from asking anymore questions.

"What happened to your face?" Zayn asked.
"I fell into a cabinet. It's fine." I looked away.
They weren't going to leave me alone.
"That doesn't look like you fell..." Louis said.
I stood up and threw the cigarette butt to the ground. I looked him dead in the eyes.
"Yeah well I don't remember asking for your opinion. It's none of your fucking business anyways. Piss off." I said storming back inside.
I couldn't believe they had the audacity to question me. Who did they think they were. When I looked back I noticed they were following me. They followed me into the elevator. I was fuming.
"So what, you're going to follow me to my room now?" I spat.
"Our rooms are on the same floor...did Lisa not tell you?" Liam asked quietly.
"No. she conveniently left that out."
When the elevator stopped I rushed out.
"You sure you're okay?" Niall called.
"Oh yeah, I'm fucking great." I said storming down to my room. I slammed the door behind me and slid to the ground. I couldn't help the tears falling down my face. Here I was, ruining everything again.
I never meant to be so cruel, but I was.
Something about being honest was unbearably hard for me. I didn't want anyone's sympathy. I just wanted to disappear. Moments later a knock startled me. I looked through the peep hole. It was Harry.
What did he want? I wiped my eyes and cracked the door just enough for him to see my face.
He held out an ice pack and a tube of antibiotic ointment. I looked at him cautiously.
"Here... thought this might help."
I took the items from him slowly.
"My mum used to use this on me when I was a kid. Always getting roughed up. The ointment will heal that cut overnight. And I use the ice packs for my shoulder after shows. But it's yours. Please."
He gave a small smile. I wanted to trust him... but I wasn't ready. What he did was sweet, and I wouldn't forget it. But we knew very little about each other.
"Thank you. Really." I said.
"Anytime. I'm right across the hall if you need anything." He gave a small wave before walking into his room. I shut the door and went to the bathroom.
I used the cream and the ice pack. Hopefully it would work. I Laid down and shut the light off.
It had been a long day, but I was finally free.