Jalex - My Toxic Valentine

Chapter 1

Alex’s P.O.V

I saw it in the window, saw him. I started running and running. Trying to stop it, trying to stop him. I burst in the room, and found him dead.

“NO!!” I cried. Oh god, another nightmare. I wish these would stop. When my brother took his life, he also took my life, my happiness and my childhood. I grabbed my phone and checked the time. 5:34. Damn it! I lay back in bed, and tried to get back to sleep. After half an hour, I decided it was pointless, so I just got up, took a shower and tried to forget about the whole nightmare.

Within an hour, I had showered, done my hair, get dressed, ate breakfast, done my teeth, and I was basically ready to go to school. It was only half past 7, so I pulled out my phone and started listening to Blink 182.

Say it aint so,

I will not go,

Turn the light off

Carry me home.

“ALEX!” I heard my mother say. That’s me, Alex Gaskarth. A.k.a the Loser Kid, the Faggot. I live in Brooklyn and I'm 16. Ever since it came out that I was gay, I have lost the respect of all the students and teachers. The one person who has stuck with me is my mum. She has always understood me, and I loved her to pieces.

“YEAH MOM” I called.

“YOU UP?”

“YEAH”

“Really?!” she said, bursting into my room. I normally stay asleep until 8, and then I am in a rush to leave the house by 8:15.

“Yeah mom, I am awake, I had another nightmare” I explained. She gave me a sympathetic look and sat down next to me and gave me a hug.

“Sweetie, you have to understand. He’s gone, and has been for 6 years. I know it’s hard to let go of him, but it’s been 6 years now. I know that we will miss him, but don’t let it ruin your life” she said, bluntly, but truthfully. I knew that I had to get over his death. I miss him like crazy, but ever since that day, I shut out the world, all my friends, and my family. I went into a state of depression, and mostly kept to myself. Playing guitar in the music rooms at lunch, sitting alone at the back in lessons. Lonely. My mom hugged me and kissed my forehead.

“Come on, you’ll be late for school. Hey, isn’t that new kid coming today?” she asked me. This is true. A new boy was supposed to be moving here from LA and I was supposed to show him around. Not like he would go near me, he would hear the gay remarks and run away; scared I would rape him or something. He’ll make friends with the Jocks, and he’ll start to make my life hell, just like them.

“Yeah, I don’t know why you’re so excited mom; he’ll hate me, just like the rest.” I mumbled. I hated seeing the hopeful look on her face, I knew it’d never happen, and then she’d be sad and disappointed. “I’ll try my best though mom” I said, standing up and heading for the door.

“Okay hon, love you!” she called after me.

“LOVE YOU TOO!” I yelled back, got in my shitty little car, and drove to school, blasting Blink 182 from the speakers.

Soon, I arrived at my personal hell. Grabbing my headphones and iPhone, I slammed the door and locked it. I then put my headphones in and walked to my locker. After I grabbed my books from my locker and shoved them in my rucksack, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around and saw a boy, about my age, with long dark hair that covered his face.  He was tall, and had cute little child-like features. My heart started fluttering and butterflies erupted in my stomach.

“It’s Alex, right?” he asked me.  He looked so shy and naïve. He must be the new boy, if not, he’d know better than to talk to the faggot.

“Yeah, that’s me. What’s it to you?” I asked, and I saw him wince at my sharp tone. I immediately felt guilty.

“I’m Jack, I’m new here, and apparently you’re supposed to show me around, but I’m sure you have better things to do, I’ll just... find it on my own.” He mumbled, turning away. I reached his shoulder and stopped him.  He looked surprised by my actions, but I didn’t care, I had upset the guy on his first day, like a total asshole.

“Sorry, no I’ll sho-“I began; only to be interrupted my laughing jocks. They walked up to jack and put their big hand on his fragile shoulder.

“Mate, I wouldn’t be hanging around with this faggot, unless you want him to buttfuck you as soon as your back is turned, I suggest you let US show you around” He boomed. Jack looked surprised (probably at the “faggot” remark) and disgusted (probably because he even went near me).  He took one look at me, and one look at the herd of jocks. Then he shrugged.

“It’s alright, I’d rather chill with Alex, if that’s okay with you. Get off me man” he said, in a confident voice. I was taken aback, who would pass up a chance to be a jock, to hang out with the lonely gay guy? The jocks looked just as surprised as me.

“Seriously?” they asked, and they laughed when jack nodded. “Fine then, don’t say we didn’t warn you” they grunted and staggered away. He turned around and faced me, a small grin on his face.

“So, those guys give you hassle?” he asked me in a soft voice. I nodded and he turned around and gave them the finger. I quickly pushed his hand down when I saw the angry looks on their faces. Oh shit, now they were coming up to us.

“Oh fuck, RUN” he yelled. Grabbing my hand and running down the corridor. I dumbly followed him and let him pull me into a classroom and leant against the door with him, him laughing like mad and me with my knees tucked up and head buried in my hands.

“What the fuck is up with them? Is faggot their best insult?” he asked me, I removed my head from my hands and took a deep breath.

“No, they weren’t kidding, I am gay.” I said, he looked horrified. “No! No! No! I’m not going to buttfuck you or anything! You don’t have to wor-“I began, and then he interrupted me.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude or anything! I just thought they were- Oh god!” he said. I let out a chuckle. “It’s not funny! I’m really sorry” he put an arm around me and gave me a small hug. I felt myself shudder under his warm touch. It took all my willpower not to snuggle into his armpit and rest my head on his shoulder. We felt a sharp jolt as the jocks banged at the door. Jack panicked and moved his arm away. We both stood up and opened the door, running away as fast as we could. As we were running, the bell rang, so we ran towards our next class, and we stopped abruptly outside the door, so we could walk in calmly.

“Ah, hello, you must be Jack Barakat.” Said Mrs Brown. He nodded and followed me to the back of the class as I sat down, with him next to me. I got out my English book and turned to the back, so I could write more lyrics. I have always had a dream of being in a band, but I probably wouldn’t. I didn’t have any friends, let alone band members. Within about 10 minutes, I saw a bit of paper slide next to me. I unfolded it and read the note that was inside.

“I’m bored. Talk to me? J” I grinned and scribbled a note back.

“Fine, so why did you move from LA to this shithole? A”

“I was bullied L J”

“Why? What did they say? A”

“Same as you, they were calling me a faggot. J”

“Oh.. and are you? A”

“Yeah… I think so. J”

“Oh, cool. A”

“Hey, my mom is throwing this lame housewarming party later, you want to come? J”

“Yeah cool, what time? A”

“7 till 10. J”

“Really? A.”

“Yeah, I told you it would be lame. J”

“ALEX AND JACK!” shouted Mrs Brown. Oh shit. Busted. “If you wouldn’t mind, please pass love notes in your own time!” the rest of the class erupted in laughter, and I stared down at my hands while everyone called me a faggot. I felt my eyes water and a hot tear roll down my face. That was until I felt somebodies hand clasp mine protectively under the table. I followed the arm, and saw that it was Jack, when I looked up at him with a smile; he smiled right back at me. All of a sudden, this party didn’t seem so lame.