A Scar from my Past

1.A Beautiful Morning

I woke up early. Staring at the roof of my room has now become boring. Today is something new. Something special.

First day of school. Even thinking about it makes me nervous.

I would be really excited for this day every year , but not this time. Everything is different now.

I'm not a famous student here. I've got no reputation. I'm starting fresh. I may never like it.

But being the super extroverted self that I am, a part of me already knows that it will be only a matter of few days before everyone at school will know about me.

I have this need where I have to be the center of attention amongst the group. It gives me certain levels of comfort and reduces my anxiety.

I should pull myself together, why am I so nervous about it? The fact that everyone in the school is new is exciting but it is very unlike me to feel this way.

The school is established only this year, so everybody is new. This gives me ample opportunity to form new bonds.

Fame comes to me effortlessly, so maybe I am scared that I have to build my reputation all over again. That must be it. That is why I'm nervous.

Now that the reason for my nervousness is out of the way,I've got other things to think about.

How am I going to introduce myself? What am I going to wear? What should I have for lunch? What if there are no nice kids there? What will happen if I don't top the first exam?

OMG.. too much to do. I jump out of my bed and rush to the bathroom. Finish brushing my teeth really quickly. Hop into the shower and rinse my body thoroughly. Who wants to smell bad on their first day of school? Not me .

After drying myself, I wrap the towel around me and move to my closet. Normally I would have to decide my outfit every day, but this school has a uniform, so I've saved two minutes of my morning routine.

I pick out the new uniform , it looks so good. I mentally hope it looks the same way on me. It is a white shirt paired with a navy blue plaited skirt fitted with a blue and white striped belt and tie.

The belt reminds me of the flag of some country. The white strap in between two blue stripes, I've definitely seen this combination in some flag. But can't place a finger on which.

I just brush the thought aside as I know I'm not good at Geography and continue dressing. My crew length socks are also of the same color as my skirt. My black shoes are shining as they are freshly polished.

I look at myself in the mirror once before heading to the dining room to have my breakfast.

"Good Morning!" my mom notices my presence in the kitchen.

" You look so good in your uniform. You know we are proud of you, right? "

"Yea" I answer blankly. I've been hearing this we are proud of you statement almost every day since my first day of Kinder Garden.

I silently have my breakfast. My mom senses something is wrong when I'm silent, because even when I was Having my tooth fixed a few years back I was talking to the dentist throughout the procedure.

He tried asking me to shut up initially but gave up after a few tries. That is the kind of girl I am. Even when the world is about to end, I will have something to say about it.

So when I actually shut my mouth for more than a minute, it is a very clear indication that something id terribly wrong.

"What are you thinking about?" she asks after a while.

"Nothing."

"Do you think I will believe that?"

It'a hard to fool my mom. I always get into trouble because of this quality of hers.

"Umm.. I have been thinking.. What if I don't make any friends there?

"What?? you the mighty Sammy are thinking about not making friends. How can that be even possible? " The way she said it was very dramatic as if the possibility of me not making friends is a nonexistent equation.

That made me laugh. that was re-assuring.My mom exactly knows how to cheer me up.

It's time to leave now. I have no bag as the books are not issued yet. I recently bought a new bag that looked really good with this uniform but the time to use it is not here yet.

I say goodbye to my mom and remind my dad that he needs to drop me at school. My dad is reading the newspaper as usual and forgot about the promise he made to drop me.

He is still undressed. I might be late to school on the first day. The thought freaks me out. I might be a cool person but when it comes to time, I'll freak out. I need to be on time. Always. No exceptions.

So I start yelling at my dad to get dressed fast and I'm already running down the stairs with the keys in my hand. I start the car and wait in the passenger seat for him to come.

He took a whole two minutes to just put on a shirt. I'm mad right now. My dad senses it and hurries into the car. I am still yelling at him when we are already half way there.

The school is nearby but not too close to walk everyday. So I opted for the school bus which would be picking me up and dropping me back everyday. Since it is the first day, I'll have to go by my own and the bus is supposed to drop me back.

We turn around a corner and the building comes into sight. It is a new building , some part of it still under construction. My dad stops the car . I jump out of it and yell " Bye dad. See you in the evening" and run inside without even turning back to look at him.