I went to school today and I felt like extreme crap.
I went to the bathroom so many times throughout the day just to sit in a stall and cry. I was so miserable.
I saw him today. twice.
The first time I saw him meeting up with his friends and I turned around with my best friend and sat on the outside breaking apart.
Then we continued walking around the school and on the way to the cafeteria, we made eye contact.
I walked faster. A lot faster.
I can't go a second in the day without him being on my mind. He made me so happy and then he left. Taking my happiness with him.
I gave him my heart and I told him so many things and I trusted him. He was my friend. A special friend to me.
He told me he cared about me but because of that he had to cut me off. I don't understand still on what happened but all I know is that just because he caught feels, he couldn't talk to me anymore.
What makes me so stressed is the fact that he lied. He didn't care about me. If he cared about me, he wouldn't have just left me in a snap. He would have made me understand why he can't be there for me anymore, why we can't text anymore, and why we can't have each other in our lives.
My life is just crumbling apart every 2 seconds. I can't think of a time today where I was happy. It takes a lot for me to put this online but who actually cares ? I don't have anyone to talk to because everyone is too busy with their own lives.
Someone told me to talk to my family. But what family ?
The people that do nothing but yell at me, treat me like I'm some horrible person, and leave me out of everything?
They tell me that everything I do is wrong and every single day they make me feel like I am the biggest disappointment to ever exist. I'm not the perfect daughter with straight A's, I am not the most beautiful girl in the world, I am not the most athletic. I am just me.
It all just kind of hurts. To feel so isolated. To be alone. He was the only person I texted on the daily. The only person who asked how my day was. The only person holding me together.
Gone.
Just like that.
And Donald Trump is currently winning the polls so we all dead.
11/8/16
