Harry Potter and the Ties that Bind

Chapter 21

Harry told Daphne and Susan everything. He informed them about eidetic memory, what it was, what having it meant for him. They learnedabout his past, his knowledge, his dreams and goals and desires. They learned about the darkness that lay within him.

And they accepted it. They told him that his past didn't matter, that the things he'd done, the horrible, inhumane acts he had committed against his family, didn't matter to them. This surprised him. He didn't know why, but it did. Still, hearing them tell him that it was okay meant the entire world to him.

That night, Harry had slept soundly for the first time in months.

Harry was woken up the next morning by incessant shaking and a familiar voice. "Harry? Harry? Come on, Harry. You should wake up now."

"Nnggg..." Harry groaned as he opened his eyes. Everything looked fuzzy. The world was a blurry mishmash of colors, until Harry blinked several times to refocus. Then the images sharpened, and he realized that someone was standing over him. "Neville?"

Harry tried to recall the events of the previous day. He remembered crying in Daphne and Susan's arms, remembered telling them all about his past and eidetic memory. However, his memories after that were blurry. He remembered a bunch of sights and sounds and smells, but it was like a film had been cast over his vision. There were dark spots, blank space. If Harry had to define it, it was like he'd been sliding in and out of consciousness.

He did specifically remember someone helping him walk. He could remember the feel of an arm around his waist, but that was it. Nothing else came to mind.

The problem with eidetic memory, Harry lamented, was that you only remembered what you saw. You can't remember something that you didn't see. Also, because the memory was always seen exactly as you remembered it, if your vision was blurred by, say, exhaustion or tears, then all you'd get was a grainy image. It was the same if you passed out.

"What time is it?" Harry asked.

"It's a little after five in the morning," Neville said. "I woke you up because I thought you'd want to exercise."

Exercise...

How long had it been since Harry had properly exercised? He hadn't done any exercising since the end of the last school year. His teacher would have been ashamed of him.

"Right... I should exercise. Thanks, Neville."

"You're welcome, Harry." Neville tried for a smile, but it was more guarded than Harry remembered it being.

Harry slowly climbed out of bed. His limbs felt stiff. He'd been ignoring it since he felt like there were more important things to do, but now that he'd been reminded of how he'd neglected his body, he could feel how poor his physical condition was. His limbs used to be limber and flexible. Now they felt like wires stretched taut. They used to be strong. Now they were like limp noodles. He'd let himself go.

How shameful.

Waving a hand at his trunk, Harry summoned his gym clothes and put them on. Neville was still in the room. He was staring at Harry with a gaping jaw, perhaps because of the wandless magic. Harry thought about trying to cover up what he'd done without thinking, but in the end, he decided not to. He didn't want to lie to his friends anymore.

"Hey, Neville?"

"Y-yes?"

"I'm... sorry."

"Sorry?"

Harry rubbed his arm. "About the way I treated you and everyone else. It was wrong, and I'm sorry."

"Ah." Neville looked about as uncomfortable as Harry felt. "Don't worry about that. I know you were going through a rough patch. We all were, but you had it the worst."