It was almost four months ago since I Let out my feelings and lost my best friend, Allison. I try to forget that night. I've been trying to forget her to. It's use to be really hard without her. Now it's been somewhat easier. When it First happened, all I ever did was think about it and her. It consumed my life. I felt ruined. I moved on from her, I can't say all my feelings for her have gone a way. I know they didn't, but in way they feel gone because I'm not always thinking about her. You have no idea how hard it took me to get to this place I'm at right now but with her still being gone it's might get even easier. A part of me wishes that night never happened , she never moved. Everything would be the same, But that night needed to happen. I needed her to know , I needed to know that I was right when I said that she never see me more than just a friend. And I was right. It's okay though, I'm learning to live my life without her. Who knows maybe if she ever moved back, that we could put this behind us. That might take a while. Or never happen. "Hey cutie pie," my girlfriend say while kissing me. She's nothing like Allison, at all but in a way that's good. Actually it's really good. Not In a bad way, she doesn't remind me of Allison. Allison would rather stay home and binge watch our favorite movies and order pizza, while Kylie likes to go to the Movies and eat at a nice restaurant. "Hey pretty girl," "So your still okay with us meeting each other parents tomorrow, I mean-" "Hey, I'm okay with it, Im more then okay with it," "We haven't been dating that long," "Yeah but We will be dating for a long time though" I say as I pull her in for a kiss, I honestly like my life right now. Without her. "Do you think your parent will like me?" "They'll love you" My parents always wanted me with Allison, So did I, but I know they'll be happy that I'm happy with Kylie. "Oh you should bring me flowers , my parents will love that. I mean if you want, it'll for sure give you points" "Flowers it is," "Roses" "You know I don't like roses," One reason I don't like roses. They remind me of Allison. You know why, because Allison Rose Evans. And I don't need any reminders of her. "Fine, surprise me then. I don't know why you hate them, there beautiful." Yeah she sure is. I mean they sure are. "Let's do something tonight," "I would but I'm hanging out with Sebastian tonight," "You rather be with him then me," she says with a pouty face "Fine, I'll cancel" "Yay!" "Let me text Him,"
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Sebastian and I are really close. He says Kylie's changed me. It's not that, it's just I spend most of my time with her. She helped me forget Allison. "Ok love, what do you want to do tonight" "Well we can go somewhere dark, so we can do a whole lot of this" she says while pulling me in for a kiss. "Mm I like the way you think, movie it is" I'm not using her, I swear. I really do have feelings for her. But a part on me knows that she's not Allison and she never will be. I hate that part that thinks that. It's ruining any chance that I have at truly being happy.
