The day I tried to kill myself,
Was the first day in months I said I love you to my mom,
The day I tried to kill myself,
Was the day I actually ate something in three days..it was the most delicious thing I have ever consumed.
The day I tried to kill myself,
Was the day I noticed how beautiful the world truly was.
I noticed how green the grass had became,
and how the smell of my mothers cooking drove me insane.
I noticed how my dogs looked at me whenever I would leave the house,
they would look at me hoping I would come home to them to give them belly rubs and treats that I picked up from the rite aid near my home.
I raced with my cats down the drive way of my home one more time and when I stepped onto the street they stared at my dissapearing figure too scared to follow me.
The day I tried to kill myself,
I noticed how much of me I STILL haven't found.
I haven't found what my future may be compiled of,
I haven't found what my life would be like outside of my home without my paranoia by my side 24/7.
Once I was at that bridge,
I climbed the rails,
stared at at the heavy oncoming traffic,
took a deep breath,
and felt something tug on the back of my shirt.
I stared up at a man who had to be atleast in his 50's.
He was cussing asking what I was doing.
I looked around me and people had stopped their cars just to watch me.
This man kept yelling at me which caused me to finally break,
to finally cry.
He told me that I was young,
beautiful,
and full of life that I had not yet lived.
The day I tried to kill myself was the day I realized,
I wanted to experience what I felt on the way to the bridge again.
When I stepped back inside my home after a month of being is a phychiatric hospital,
I stared down at my dogs as they jumped up and down trying to reach me.
I looked around and saw how lively my home was,
I saw how beautiful my mother's smile was.
The food that night was amazing and it didn't taste like dull hospital food.
That night I laid my head on my bed underneath the covers that were not cheap but my mom decided to buy them anyways since they matched my room so well and thanked that man who stopped me for this second chance at life that I may never have again.
