Finding Who I Am (GirlxGirl)

Finding Who I Am- Prologue

(Step One) Abuse: 1) To use wrongly or improperly. 2) To treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way. 3) To speak harshly, insultingly, and unjust to. 4) To commit sexual assault upon. 5) To deceive or mislead.   

(Step Two) Runaway: 1) A person who runs away; fugitive; deserter. 2) The act of running away. 3) A young person, especially a teenager, who runs away from home.

(Step Three) Disguise: (verb) To change appearance or guise of so as to conceal identity or mislead, as by means of deceptive garb. 2) To conceal or cover up the truth or actual character of by a counterfeit form or appearance; misrepresent. (noun) 1) That which disguises. 2) The make up, mask, costume, or overall change in appearance of an entertainer. 3) The act of disguising.

(Step Four) Love: 1) A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2) A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for parent, child, or friend. 3) sexual passion or desire. 4) A person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

If you put those definitions out in the open, on paper like that, it may sound easy. It may SOUND easy but if you actually have to live my life, you will think of it all completely differently.

Let's just say my life has never been a happy life to begin with. My mother was what you would call a crack addict. I would call her something completely different but I don't want to go around disrespecting the dead today now do I? My so called father- If you want to even call him that- was just a dirty pimp- hinting on what I would call my mother- that believe he can become my "Daddy" after he married my mom. Yeah right. As if. And then there's my step brother, Kyle. After my mom and my "Daddy" died, he became my guardian. He is such a GREAT guardian. NOTE THE SARCASM THERE. He was legally a adult, being 19 and all, so he became my guardian. The courts thought it would be a good idea if my step brother became my guardian since he was basically the only family I had left. I bet if they found out about the abuse then they wouldn't think that anymore.

So as you can see, my life was never the cherry on top of the sundae. There was never a summer where there where no worries and you could have a water fight. There where no Christmases where we would stay up a night eating cookies and waiting for Santa. There where no Halloweens where we would watch scary movies all night long.  There were never really any good childhood memories in the Michelson's household. Well technically it's Owens' household because mom married Chris Owens. Or would it still be Michelson since mom hyphened her name? Ugh! Whatever! It doesn't matter anymore. It's giving me a headache anyways. 

Okay so back to the point. There was never really a good memory in this house. The house where Blair Lovely Michelson lived.  If it hasn't snapped to you yet that I am talking about myself then I'm just going have to say I'm am very sorry for your mental health. You may need to check that out. 

You're off topic again Blair!  

Anyways, It's the house where my mother died over ODing. It's the house where my stepfather died in the backyard over a stupid bag of weed. It the house where the abuse began. It's the house where I was almost chocked to death. It's the house where death seems to follow at every corner of the house. So now that I have painted such and amazing picture of my amazing life let me explain who I am.

My name is Blair Lovely Michelson. My mom always told me Lovely is my middle name because my real father said I looked lovely the day I was born. I may sound kind of conceited but I'm telling the truth. My real dad was dying of cancer and three months before he died, I was born. He said I was lovely and they wanted my middle name to remind me of my father even if I have never actually met him. I was named Blair after my grandmother on my mothers side.

You're probably wondering about my mother. How could she be really sweet but then come out so evil? You see before my father died, he was the only thing that keep my mother from using the drugs. After he died, there was nothing for my mother to really hang on to. I was just a baby and her feeling over my father clouded her mind and she went out to find someone to help her. She than met Chris and after a few years, they got married. I never believed it was over love. Mom wanted him for the drugs. Chris wanted her for her..... services. I guess you can call it that.

Ahem. Anyways back to Blair. Wow, that really just sounded conceited. So I have light brown hair that stops a little lower than the middle of my back. Baby blue eyes. Full lips. The height of 5'7. I don't really know my weight but I'm pretty skinny because I have a high metabolism that any girl would die for. I have been living with my guardian- my step brother- ever since my mother and my step dad died 3 years ago. Well my mom died 3 years ago and my step dad died a year after. I barely have any friends because friends mean getting close to people, getting close to people means questions, and questions mean the truth. They would want to know why I wear the many clothes I wear to cover the bruises.They would want to know why I have a busted lip, or a injured arm. They would want to know why I flinch every time a guy touches me. Too many question, not enough lies in my head. So yeah, I don't do friends. I am 18 years old. Well technically I'm 17 but in a few days I'll be 18.

A few days.

A week to be exact.

A week till I'm free.

A week till my play will be in action. I have been saving my money I make from my job as a waitress at the dinner, and every time I get any extra money from Kyle.

Kyle may be abusive and a drug dealer but he still gives me money, but it's really for food, clothes, girl product or stuff like that. Plus I steal a few extra dollars when he isn't looking.

  I bought a one way airplane ticket to Hawaii and I have enough money to get me by for a few months. Enough money for a cheep apartment, food, and a cheep car. All I have to do is talk to the guy  that lives in Hawaii whom I have been taking to, for that car that I saw on the internet. It's not in so much of a bad condition. If you look at it closely, you can tell it was a really good car a while back. If you look pass and Underneath the cracked paint job, you can tell it would be a good car. Even if it did break down, I could try to fix it. I'm pretty good with cars believe it or not.

The night of my birthday I will have everything ready. My clothes will be packed. Money would be ready. I will have the car working and ready. I have it all planed out. The time, the place, my new name, my new appearance, my new attitude. Everything. All I have to do now was just wait and get everything ready for the first day of my new life.

And the last day as Blair Lovely Michelson.

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Okay so this is my new story. I'm sorry if there are grammer errors or spelling errors. If there are just tell me and I will fix them. You can inbox me or just leave a comment, and also leave a comment about what you think about the story. Is it good, bad, or so-so. Leave your thoughts in the comment box. Haha that rhymes!!