dearest,
though maybe you don't feel it at all,
in my mind, you'd always stand tall.
i treasure my time with you.
you have the most exquisite aura out of all the people i've met.
being with you feels like basking in warm sunlight, as the winds gently kissed my skin.
and for the first time,
i ask myself,
is this happiness?
my head is clouded with biased judgement. your voice, your face, my nagging, and all of our conversations flood my mind.
and i know,
if being with you is happiness,
then
i don't deserve it.
maybe that's why you keep leaving, and i'll keep crying.
you keep questioning what life is to me,
and to the world.
but neither of us can answer them.
for i am weak
and you are
strong;
for you are kind
and i am
cruel,
for you are
beautiful
and i am
grotesque,
for you are loved
and
i am left alone,
for you are blind
and
i am lost,
for you are wise
and
i am
novice,
for you are
crumbling
and i am
shattering,
for the world is
dark
and we are
dying...
and for
our victory,
and
for
our glory,
because
we're not going to win if we don't fight.
so look me in the eyes, one last time. hold my hand, and kiss my skin,
and
tell me you're going to live.
years and years and
years
we would be probably be separated,
you go your own way and i will go mine,
or we would be miraculously united,
blushing cheeks, disheveled hair and some red wine
but you and i,
we would be somewhere better,
somewhere far away,
where you can close your eyes
and imagine the swiftness
of serendipity around you
for they are eternal
and there,
our dreams are
treasured
and
your smile brings
them to
life.
and even 2000 years
behind in time,
one thing for sure,
for all time i have left
watching you from a detour
and the love that i'm bereft
i'll keep my waiting secure
and if our path doesn't cross each other's anymore,
and you think you have done something wrong,
with mistakes gluing on your track record,
don't have a disgruntled
look upon
your face.
because
i would be
burning in
hell
with arms
opened wide,
expecting
your visage
and figure.
because
i know.
my waiting time
has just
begun.
•
love,
an insignificant bystander.
α
