make the pain stop| j.d

Chapter 19||Broken||

Jakob POV (Not edited)
No, no, no! What Ethan is telling me can't be true! She couldn't of been by a car! I ran to the hospital faster than I ever thought I could run. I can't believe this! This is my fault! If I hadn't bailed on her and went out with Ella, I may of possibly had her cuddling up to me watching a movie or something! But no! I go and make a dick move!
As I ran into the hospital I spotted Ethan. "Ethan!" I shouted running over to him. "Where is she?! When can I see her?! How is she?!" I threw all these questions at him, all I need to know is that she's ok.
"Jakob..." He started and I looked at him closely getting ready to take in every word he was about to say. "She's um she's in a coma." He said just below a whisper as he wiped his teary eyes. "What?" I managed to squeak out.
"She's in a coma." He repeated and I just shook my head. This is all my fault. All I could think about was her small petite body, laying there.
"N-no. She can't be." I said shaking my head. "Where is she?!" I said raising my voice causing people to look. "Jakob you have to calm down first. People are looking." Ethan said looking around. "I don't care people are looking Ethan! I just want to see her! Where is she?!" I shouted. "She's room 308 along the corridor, maybe you should wait for Nicola before you go in though?"
To be honest if it was anyone else I would of waited until their family got here but not with Chay, I needed to know she was ok. I quickly walked to her room and waited outside a couple seconds before walking in to see her lifeless body connected up to wires.
"Chaypin." I whispered as I walked over to her and took her hand, sitting down on the armchair next to her bed. "Please baby wake up. I'm sorry. This is my fault. Trust me when I know your ok I'm gone, I'll be out your life and you'll never have to see or worry about me again. Just please wake up." I whispered holding her hand tightly as I listened to the heart monitor beep away.
I knew it was a good sign but I so badly wanted it to shut up. It was doing my head in.
Chaypin POV
I could hear it. I could hear it all, every little bit of it. The cars breaks squeaking as it sped to a stop but that stop wasn't good enough. It was too late. It had already hit me, leaving me laying on the cold hard floor. I heard the driver shouting for help. Next thing I know I hear sirens and Chris. He was shouting but I couldn't respond to him. I was trying so hard too but I just couldn't. Then I heard Ethan as I felt myself being moved. I then felt his hand. He was holding mine. Someone told him to call someone or something? I'm guessing he called Jakob.. Ethan hasn't come to see me since I got here, either has Chris. It's felt like an eternity.
But the thing that's hurting me most right now is the fact that Jakob is blaming himself. This is none of his fault. I can't believe he'd blame himself for this. When I wake up I will bash him! Well I am gonna wake up right? I'm not gonna die right?
God sake. I'm talking to myself now. This is not a good sign.
Jakob POV
My head snapped around to the door as I heard it open and saw Nicola running in crying. Her name was all down her face and she looked like she had a full I dunno tub thing that you keep mascara in, on and she'd just come out the shower. "Chaypin?! Can you hear me?! Wake up!" She shouted holding her other hand.
"Nic it doesn't work. I've tried." I told her through my tears and that's something I never wish I'd done. "THIS IS YOUR FAULT! CHRIS TOLD ME WHAT HAPPENED! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! YOU SHOULD NEVER OF ASKED HER OUT! YOU HAD THIS PLANNED DIDN'T YOU?! YOU'D COME BACK ACT LIKE YOU HAD CHANGED! SHE FELL FOR IT! YOU SET HER UP! YOU DON'T DESERVE TO SEE HER! GO! DON'T COME BACK NONE OF US WANT YOU HERE! I KNOW FOR SURE CHLOE WON'T EVEN BE ABLE TO SPEAK YOUR NAME WHEN SHE WAKES UP AND FINDS OUT YOU'VE DONE THIS TO HER!" She screamed as she got right up in my face. I knew there was no point disagreeing or anything because she'd beat me up.
I left. I left her. Again. Again I promised I wouldn't let anyone hurt her but I do it again. I don't know why it's like this. I don't want it to be. I guess I'm just not good enough.
I went back to the hotel and got my stuff. I was going home and I know for sure I will not be back in Melbourne for a long time.
I picked up my phone and began to scroll through my contacts until I came across the one I know, will never be answered. I called it, holding my phone against my ear waiting for her answering machine so I could hear her voice, but it didn't go to that. It was answered and all the hope I had left me when I heard his voice.
"Hello....Hello?" Ethan's voice sounded through the phone and I hung up. That's all I could do. I thought it was her for a moment. I guess I'll find out if she ever wakes up. Somehow. Sometime.
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A/N: So basically I am very sorry for the lack of updates and how bad they are! Anyway yeh I haven't updated in like forever so I hope you enjoy! Also I have kinda started writing a new book and I'll probably post it after this book is done! I don't know how long this book has left but I'm running out of ideas for it so I think I might be coming to the end...