Chapter 1 :
Once,
again I come downstairs to beer bottles on the floor in this ugly ass house that I try to keep clean but, always gets messed up with beer bottles. Beer always spilled on the floor. Dishes aren't clean. Furniture moved around cause my parents fight about who get's the last beer in the kitchen. They also fight about bills and dad always saying " see if she wasn't here we wouldn't be fighting or have a lot of bills to pay". it hurts a lot that every time they argue it comes to me about it being my fault. My mom is the one who defends me but, the drama still here. I just want my way out of here and live life like I want it to be.
I went in the kitchen to find something to eat before I leave. I opened the fridge and there was nothing but beer (of course) , water, and half a gallon of milk. " Another day with almost nothing to eat " , I said to my self and sighed . I looked in the cabinet and saw only peanut butter and jelly. I grabbed two slices of bread I also see in the cabinet. I took out a knife and started to make the sand which and started eating it with a glass of milk. I put the glass cup inside the sink. I started to wash the dishes.
I heard someone go inside the kitchen while I was trying to organize everything and started sweeping the floor. " Good morning mama " , I said still sweeping. " good morning baby" . She opened the fridge and sighed when she barely saw anything. " mama I'm going to go the store and buy us some food"
" what type of money you got?" , she asked looking at me like if I didn't have any. " I have money left over for dancing around the corner from here" , I have $500.00 saved up from dancing. Dancing is like my escape from the problems and stress. Also the feelings I had inside for so long. I can only express it is by dancing. I dance to hip hop and R&B. I just go out with my boom box and just start break dancing, flips ... basically all kinds of dancing you can find in that genre of dancing. I usually leave my hat on the floor and people put a lot of money inside.
" yes mama , I already told you that a lot of times " . I threw away what was in the dust pan and put the broom back where it was. " I'm sorry baby it's so difficult lately , it's hard" . She said and sat on the dinning room chair and started rubbing her face in stress. I felt bad so I went and rubbed her sore feet.
" Thank you baby , this is why I love having you here. Makes everything less stressful" , she said enjoying the massage I was giving her. She just made me smile. Finally I get a good comment since we've been living like this. " Anything for you mama " . I got up and started massaging her shoulders.
"You know I love you right?" . "Yes mama"
"You know , you can't suffer like me. But , you .. you have a way out and make something of yourself. You're not like most of us. You got straight A's , You have a job , you help out in the house even though you know it's hard. On top of that you dance and get money. I can see you got a good future ahead of you. "
" I know mama" . still rubbing on her back. " no, you don't. Like I said you're not the rest of us. Here struggling with money , paying bills , taking care of a child , and having 2 jobs to keep a roof above people's head... you have a way out of the life of struggle." . I thought for a moment... I have a way out? that's no chance anytime soon. Not with this life. " I don't know mam-
" You will know . I know for a fact... just takes time. "
"Ok mama I got to got take a shower and go to the store and buy food. I'll buy you your favorite food. After I have to work. Don't stress about nothing today just relax on your day off" , I said about to walk off but then she said " you're a blessing. I might of not have survived if you wasn't here" , she said in tears of joy " oh mama " . I went and gave her a big hug. She deserves it.
