Recovery

Residence

KAIA

Walking out of St Vincents hospital into the bright morning sunlight made me breathe a sigh of relief. Having to come here once a week was already more than enough, so to be here again was almost enough to kick my anxiety over the edge again.

Breath Kaia. You're out now.

Just thinking about the smell of sickness, helplessness, confusion, fear, uncertainty, and the ever-present scent of sanitizer made me want to curl up into a ball.

"Hello? Kaia? Hello?"

Niall was talking to me, but I was lost in that terrifying head space of not knowing if I should run & hide or stay and fight. I hate how many triggers there were. All I'd wanted was to go for a surf with Jack before work before I had to come to this bloody place this afternoon. So, really, I should've been ready, but when I drive in myself, I have time to work myself up to walk through those sliding doors, across the shiny lino that someone is always mopping in this hospital that I know so well & over to the elevator well to press the well-worn up button for level 6.

"Sorry, I was somewhere else." I replied. "What did you say?"

"You alright love? You look like you've seen a ghost?" Niall questioned, a slight frown creasing the space between his brows.

"Close enough. I'll be ok." I tried to push down the dreaded knot in my stomach and paste on a smile. It must've been convincing, because the crease on his brow disappeared and he unlocked his car, for Jack & I to climb in.

"So, which way's home?" He asked while starting the car, a Justin Timberlake song blaring from the car stereo.

"Warners Ave - right near the beach. We're opposite the school."

"Nice spot. Let's get you home so you can rest hey?"

Nodding, I reply, "Thank you so much Niall. You really didn't have to do this."

"It's no worry at all. You took a nasty bump to the head so I wanted to make sure you & Jack were okay."

"Thanks again. It's so nice of you."

He nodded with a wide smile and turned back to look at the road.

The rest of the 15 minute drive was pretty quiet, save for Niall and Jack singing along to a couple of songs on the way & soon enough we were pulling into a parking spot out the front of our apartment building.

My head was starting to thump again, and I was keen for some panadol and the couch, so when I saw Niall jump out of his car & lock it before pulling our surfboards off the roof, I sighed. As kind as he was being, I really didn't feel up to visitors. I could do with a shower and some clean clothes.

"Thanks so much Niall, you've been so helpful. I'll take these from here." I tried to hint that it was time for him to go.

"I'll carry them up for you" he grinned at me.

Turning the key to my apartment, I couldn't work out why I was suddenly so nervous. I'd had men around before, but this one felt different and I couldn't quite put my finger on why. 'Must be the concussion' I thought to myself as I dropped my bag on the table inside the door and Jack bounded through, headed for his room.

I watched with a smile as Niall stepped into the space I called home and took in his surroundings.

"I'm going to shower Mum." Jack called from down the small hallway. It didn't really matter where he was, I would have heard him. After all, it's a tiny 2-bedroom unit with a kitchen, dining and lounge taking up half of the space and a small hallway leading to the two bedrooms and a bathroom that Jack & I shared.

"Can I get you a cup of tea or something Niall? Thank you again so much." I decided I should at least be polite even though the couch was calling my name.

"Yeah, thanks. That'd be great. Actually, do you have any toast? I'm starved. I haven't eaten in hours" Niall announced, running his hands through his hair.

What I'd give to run my fingers through his hair.

Wait. What? Where did that come from?

Shaking my head to clear my thoughts I gestured to the bar stools and replied, "Yeah. Of course. Just sit here, and I'll make you some breakfast."

"No way. You sit down and rest and I'll make it. What sort of a carer would I be if I had you making me food?" Niall insisted, putting his hands on my shoulders and guiding me to sit on the bar stool I had just offered to him.

Conceding, I sat at the kitchen bench, calling out directions to guide Niall around the kitchen as he put together some breakfast and cups of tea and coffee for the three of us.

Just as breakfast had been served, Jack reappeared from the hallway, rubbing his hair with a towel.

"Oh sweet! I'm starving!" He exclaimed. That kid is going to eat me out of house and home. Hollow legs, I'm sure of it.

"You and me both buddy!" grinned Niall and the apartment was quiet while we all devoured our breakfast.. Once we were finished, Niall began clearing the bench of our dishes and there was a knock at the door.

"Nan!" Yelled Jack and ran for the door.

Mum was inside in an instant.

"Oh my darling! What've you done? I told you to give up surfing, it's just not safe!" she scolded before noticing we had company.

"Hi, I'm Niall. Nice to meet you." Niall stepped forward with his hand extended to greet Mum.

Eyeing him and looking between Jack & I, she took his hand and shook it cautiously. Ever since what happened with the ex, she was extremely protective of me when it came to boyfriends.

"He's the one who saved Mum, Nan!" Jack revealed.

"Oh, well I'd better give you a hug then! I'm Rosa," Mum replied as she pulled him in for a hug and her whole demeanour changed.

"Rosa. So good to meet you. I'll just finish these dishes and I'll be on me way." Niall grinned.

'He has such a beautiful smile' I thought to myself, smiling. 'Oh my god. You really are concussed. You can't just go about daydreaming about hunky lifeguards who you've known for two seconds and are just doing their job. Especially not in your position.'

Bringing my wandering mind back to the present I realized that Mum and Jack were in the kitchen with Niall, helping to finish up the dishes and it was a sight that made my heart skip. It'd been 6 years since I'd had a man in my kitchen and I'd forgotten what it was like. As if he was reading my mind, Niall turned to me and his face lit up as he realized I was watching and he returned my gaze with a wink.

"Okay then, well I'll go now. Seems you've got this under control here Rosa. Again, it was lovely to meet you." Niall stated as he walked towards me.

Jack and Mum waved their goodbyes from the kitchen as Niall & I headed for the front door.

"Well, stay out of trouble hey? I don't want to be pulling you out of the water again." Niall chuckled. Seeing the look on my face, he quickly added, "Too soon?"

"It'll take more than this to stop me." I stated, crossing my arms, suddenly feeling a bit defensive. He has no idea how much I've been through. A slight concussion will not stop me.

"I'll bet. Well, make sure you rest up to get over that concussion so you can get back out there then. Have a good one!"

And with that he was down the steps, hands brushing through his hair to grab his sunglasses off his head and wandering back to his car.

A deep sigh escaped me, and I rubbed my hands up and down my arms, as if feeling a loss of warmth.

'I really am concussed. I need to lie down.' I thought to myself and returned inside to the sound of Jack's guitar & mum's voice.