Now That You're Gone

Thinking of You

As the week passed on I read letter by letter, and I was almost finished. At the moment, I'm at the cemetery visiting him. I sat down right in front of his tombstone, "Hi Matty Bear. It's me, Adele." I smile sadly and look up at the sky. "Your mom came by a couple days ago and gave me the box. Unfortunately, because of the second thing. I miss you so much Matt, you don't even understand. I'm sorry as well. I'm sorry that you couldn't tell me how you felt. I feel like I was too demanding to you? Yea. Well, I've had a secret as well for a while. I love you, Matthew. I always have. Ever since the 8th grade when you punched that guy in the face for trying to 'get his way' with me. I don't know what I would've done without you then, or ever. I don't know what I'm going to do without you now. If you would've told me it was getting worse, I could've done something, even if I promised you I wouldn't. if I would've done something sooner, you wouldn't be here." I sniffled putting the flowers and a teddy bear on his grave. "I miss you like crazy, Matt." I stood up and went to leave, but not before I looked back, "I love you. I will always love you, Matthew. Always." As I pulled out, a tear escaped my eye.

When I got home I went straight up to my room and grabbed the next letter. I began to read...

~Dolly,

Last night was the best. We splashed around in the pool and your eyes were shining bright. The look in your eyes took my breath away. Then after the pool, I spent the night and we talked for hours about amazing nothingness. You can talk about anything and it'll be music to my ears. Oh gosh, don't even get me started on your singing skills. I don't know why you don't just put your voice out there, like seriously, you're phenomenal. But my happiness got taken away when you dropped me off at home. I tried getting away, but it didn't work. I tried so hard, Adele. But he hurt me bad this time. He gave me a black eye, broken arm, bruised stomach, and all because I wasn't there to wash his car. Pathetic right? I agree. To ease the pain, I thought of you. I thought of the day we went camping with your parents and in the middle of the night we snuck into their tent and put worms on their faces. My god, I never laughed so hard in my life!! I will always cherish those memories. I can't wait for our next adventure together.

Love you and you know it,

Matty Bear ~

I smiled as I read that letter. I wish we went on one more before he... I cut myself off, sighing. I just wish my best friend had to go at such a short time. I wish we would've did more adventures together; I wish he could have lived his life in happiness. I wish we admitted our feelings to one another and then we'd live happily ever after. But in reality, Happy Ever After's aren't real. They never will be.

I laid down on my bed, his necklace in hand and yawned. Guess it's quitting time. Matt would've laughed at that. I put the letters back in my nightstand, turned off the light, and went to bed.