Drowning Inside

Chapter 1

Every morning going to school is a challenge. You might think school itself, right? No, literally getting there. As I step outside , it's like all eyes are on you ,that one group of kids over there are laughing at you, watching you, saying " she's ugly" , "she walks weird", " she's too skinny". A bunch of thoughts just going through your head and as I look at my phone to avoid eye contact , it is covered in sweat.

I don't know why I feel this way in public. Some sort of social phobia that puts my brain in panic mode everytime .

I just wish I had some one to walk with me through all this. I would not feel that much pressure .

My school is not that far, i might as well turn to the corner where there is less people. This corner is on the same block with my school. There is a lot of houses and trees. I love walking through blocks with many trees, it relaxes my hyper nerves and plus, no one is ever really there. At the end of the block I start to see children going inside the school and in the distance I see my best friend. Everyone thinks Dehora and I look alike for some reason, maybe because of our black hair and height. But she always called me short , even though I'm a few inches below her.

I decided to avoid her, since she was with her boyfriend. I hate being the third wheel , like oh my god it's so awkward, like what am I suppose to do while they make out infront of me. Plus she totally forgets about me when her boyfriend is there, it's always about him. No i'm not jealous. I just wish she knew how to balance a relationship and a friendship, like I told my aunt, who I tell all the gossip to. I mean she's really cool.

I stop a little bit to give them space to pass, trying to avoid them from seeing me.
If Dehora sees me , she will want me to walk with her and her boyfriend. Sometimes I wonder how dose she think I feel being the third wheel, why bother asking me to tag along all the time, isn't he enough company for you. But then again when She ditches our normal activities that we use to do together when She was single, i.do start to get offended.
And to top all of this , her boyfriend was a complete jerk to me. His never serious and he always makes really offensive jokes to me, like " your so flat chested" meaning i have no boobs, incase you didn't know what that meant.
His just so stupid and stuck up and Dehora is too blinded by love to tell him when enough is enough.

I don't even think they are couple goals. He sometimes refer to Dehora as " stupid" and she is kinda taller than him. I just really hate when a boy is direspecting his girlfriend and she can't even see it.

Oh shit

She suddenly glances in my direction."TERRA,COME OVER HERE GIRL." She screamed with a wide smile on her face, revealing her dimples.

Wow, I already know how my day will be. Just freaking great.