INT.REDBECK CAFÉ, WAKEFIELD
Gordon, Billy and Tommy are sat around a table, at the far end of the room next to the window.
Each of them has just finished a meal.
A plate of scraps lies in the middle of the table.
Matt arrives with two cups of tea, followed by the waitress with another two cups of tea.
Apocalypse, a large leather and chains bound thug sits at the table just behind Gordon and Tommy.
MATT
Here you go Billy. The waitress is bringing yours in a sec.
BILLY
Nice one Matt. That waitress is a bit of all right isn't she?
MATT
Dream on Billy, none of us has a chance with somebody like her.
TOMMY
Yeah. She's probably going out with some big roughneck like him over there.
Tommy points to Apocalypse.
APOCALYPSE
(Standing up)
Do you want something?
TOMMY
No mate, I was talking about him over there.
Apocalypse turns round and there's nobody there. He looks back.
WAITRESS
Apocalypse, we don't want any trouble here. Remember what happened last time?
APOCALYPSE
Grumble grumble grumble
(sits down)
GORDON
Phew. You were lucky there Tommy, he could have killed you.
TOMMY
(pretending to punch Gordon in the bollocks)
What, you mean he might have done this?
GORDON
(Attempts to punch Tommy in the bollocks.)
No, something more like this.
Gordon and Tommy have a play fight.
BILLY
I'm sick of them two making a fool of themselves all the time.
MATT
Yeah, but what are you going to do?
BILLY
I dunno. We need something interesting to do, some kind of challenge.
MATT
Hey Billy. I'll give you £50 if you eat the contents of the scrap plate.
BILLY
What? Bones an all? Forget it. In fact, I'll give you twice that if you eat it.
Tommy and Gordon stop play fighting.
TOMMY
What was that?
MATT
£100 for anyone who eats the contents of the scraps plate.
Camera pans in on exaggerated scraps plate, full of mould and old chicken bones.
GORDON
No way, but I'll put up a Tenner for anyone who gets a date with the waitress.
