“Beside these verdurous and wind-blown fronds,
I lie with two long-legged blondes.
The wisps of comb-over that I call hair
Are slowly bleaching in the sunlit air
That’s also turning orange the skin I wear.
The wife thinks I’m on some dull business trip!
‘Poor bitch’, I think and I take another sip
Of sweet champagne with no hint of remorse.
I mean why would you bother with divorce ?
It’s so much easier to slip away
And put a week aside so you can play
Without the chance of ever getting caught
And leaving her and Robert so distraught
That they would never speak to me again.
What is the point in causing all that pain ?
It’s better to protect your son and wife
And casually build a secret life …
Soon they will want their money and I’ll pay
Oh, but who cares ? I make five grand a day !
My buzzing phone reminds me of this trick,
I tell her I’m busy, my God she’s thick.
She always accepts, never inquires.
Which is just what I want with my desires,
To sweep off suddenly Overseas,
And screw whoever I bloody well please.
In every port a new exotic squeeze
And I mean it when I say exotic,
My carnal exploits have been quite quixotic !
No doubt I’d be incapable of saying it,
But I don’t mind if there’s no trouble paying it.
Too soon, I’ll go back to my family.
And enter through the door and there will see
The trusting faces of my wife and child
Whom, without their knowledge, I have defiled
With hookers, lies and sordid relationships
On various and frequent business trips.
My wife sweetly smiles and her eyes seem glad
My son gives me a hug and says: ‘I’ve missed you, dad.’”
– poetry by Jacob Gershon
