love yourself ❀ grayson dolan

eight

it wasn't long before the floorboards outside mel's bedroom door started creaking and she knew that bruce was going to open her door.

silencing grayson, she moved him so he was behind the door and then opened it on him to come face-to-face with her father.

"melissa who are you speaking to?" bruce's brow creased in confusion but he kept a stern look plastered across his face in the meanwhile.

"i don't see how it's any of your business, you don't care anyway." melissa turned her back on her father but it only angered him more, the confusion instantly gone from his face. all that remained was rage.

"there you go again melissa," he shook his head in bewilderment. "your mother would have hated to see you like this, it's not what she would have wanted."

"stop! you don't get to say that - you don't get to do that to me!" melissa was beginning to raise her voice, and the pain built up that had always hidden in her gut. "don't you dare make me feel bad when all you've been doing since she died is drinking. drinking and not caring about a goddamn person in this world except yourself. you don't get to say that she wouldn't have wanted this on me."

melissa, her face the picture of a million words, closed the door and stumbled towards her bed. her back hit the mattress and her eyes scanned the ceiling, searching for anything - something that wasn't there.

grayson, still leaning against the wall, looked towards melissa and couldn't think. couldn't imagine how she could store such emotion without letting go.

he opened his mouth to speak, but words failed him. what could he say? what could he say to this girl who held in more than she let on? hell, he didn't even know what she was capable of.

taking a step towards melissa, grayson flinched when she spoke up.

"please don't." her eyes, which had been staring up at the ceiling, now flickered closed.

he couldn't move. he was frozen. grayson, on the one hand, wanted to run over to her and mend her with his hands. picking up pieces like that of a vase, delicate and fragile that could crack to the touch, and gluing them back together with every inch of hope he had for her.

however on the other hand, grayson had seen this other side of mel. had seen this truly shattered side of her. and knew instantly that her heart wasn't fragile, it wasn't delicate and it wasn't breakable to the touch. it was fierce and powerful. she didn't need anyone to fix her.

humans didn't need fixing. or tending to. they needed reassurance, and support. they needed time alone and self-love. humans weren't mirrors that would shatter with one blow. they were tornadoes, beautiful but dangerous. they could do the most catastrophic damage, but could also be the image of beauty.

"leave, please." melissa could not stare at anything but the inside of her eyelids as her breathing became heavy and she heard grayson's footsteps retreating towards the door.

"one last thing. your father might not know this, but i do. you are strong. what you just did there, you stuck up for yourself; you believed so strongly in yourself that you spoke up, you did something about it. that is an action of hope.

"and while hope sounds like the most fucking pathetic and stupid thing to you, its tragic not to believe in yourself. you can work wonders. and while you may still not believe, you're so strong that your voice could speak tens of thousands, millions of words. believe in yourself melissa kurg, because i know i do."

the door shut at the same time that melissa exhaled deeply, opening her eyes to stare at the space around her. space that was filled with the words that grayson had just spoken. space that spoke of sparks of hope.