Four Months Of Happiness A Year Of Sorrow

Broken & Not Okay

On May 4th 2016 my life was changed by this man. I say man because he is 16 years older than I. I had started something that didn't know was going to be so serious until now. In September I had started talking to this boy named Morgan, he was in my math class and that I didn't think it would have turned out as it did. I had slowly catch feeling for this person a lot because of Kevin my first love which was a huge mistake that I've been making. When I said because of Kevin it was because they gave the same exact personality he made me feel the same feelings. Morgan became my affair my biggest mistake of my life. I had hung out with him because I thought it would have been fun to talk to someone outside of text messages. He kissed me making me feeling so wanted and loved but then it became more than kissing it was all over me. Kissed my neck, kissed my breast, it made me so wanted. How do you stop when it felt so good how do you stop. We ended up doing it. Such a bad call I should have said no. I should have left, I should have called my mom's boyfriend to pick me up. That didn't happen it was him and I in a forest. I didn't stop him I didn't, we just did it. I felt like I needed to do it but it was all a craving. Like you're eating grandma homemade pie, you don't need it you just want it. Maybe everything is a joke in my life nothing works together. I'm a f****** cheater so be it. At least ill learn with this experience. I deserve to be alone and I mean for a long time because I'm sick of my own skin.