Atelophobia ➣ Jerrie Thirlwards

O n e.

Like any other day, Jade's alarm went off bright and early—4:00am to be exact—and summoned the exhausted brunette from her oh-so-comfortable slumber. Prying her eyes open, the Geordie was met with nothing but the complete darkness that filled each and every crevasse of her room. So, angrily turning off the ever-persistent blaring of her alarm and prying the duvet off of her shivering body, Jade forced herself to get out of bed and turn the light on.

Averting her eyes from the bulb in the center of the room, the brown-eyed beauty flipped the switch that turned it on, groaning as the warm yellow lighting cascaded all around the room. Tiredly, Jade stretched her arms and legs out as she headed to the kitchen to make herself a quick cup of tea before having to get ready for the day. She grabbed a mug and a bag of her favorite Yorkshire tea prior to flipping the kettle, now filled with water, on. Once the kettle had boiled, the brunette hung the tea bag over the edge of her favorite Disney mug and poured the piping hot water into the ceramic cup. Adding milk and sugar to taste, the drowsy Geordie carefully grasped the mug in her nimble fingertips and carried it back to her bedroom where she began to prepare herself for the day ahead of her.

First, however, she picked up her phone from the top of her vanity and unplugged it.

Before she could even unlock the device, her eye was drawn to the multitude of Twitter comments illuminating her screen—some were kind and supportive, but others were nothing but vile, disgusting, and hateful. Jade tried her hardest to draw her attention away from the hundreds upon thousands of messages, but with each negative one she read, she was sucked back into the perpetuating whirlwind of derogatory depreciation, and taking a seat at the foot of her bed, she continued to scroll.

"Why is Jade even in the band? She can't sing and is ugly as hell. The other three should kick her out of the group if they wanna be successful."

"tht jade chick needs to leave the band or smth. she's bringing the others down."

"idk who she thinks she is, but jade needs to either get some talent or leave the group. killing herself could be an option too."

Comment after horrid comment loaded on the small screen of Jade's iPhone, causing her stomach to twist with apprehension, anger, and something that felt like. . .  guilt. Devastation. Fear. Failure. She thought it was bad at first, which it was, but the messages became exponentially more and more violent and demeaning the longer she scrolled. By the time she had reached the bottom of her notification screen, the comments were more malicious than ever before, and the churning in her stomach began to feel more and more nauseating.

The petite brunette hadn't even realized that tears were now streaming down her face at a consistent, steady pace, and her breathing was coming out in heaves that were far from regulated. Her shaky hands clenched at the fabric of her pajama top as the first of many sobs escaped her mouth, and she bolted to the bathroom, the wrenching, sickly feeling that had arisen in her stomach becoming far too much to bear. Hanging her head over the toilet bowl, her knees bruising from the force of her falling onto the tile flooring, she cried and cried as she threw up all of the food she had consumed the day before and the few sips of tea she'd had only a few moments prior. The foul taste of bile made Jade feel more and more ill, causing her to vomit until there was nothing else left in her body that could possibly be rejected.

Tears were still steadily strolling down the now-gaunt-looking brunette's cheeks as she wiped her mouth and leaned back against the cool porcelain of the bath. Reading comments, no matter how horrible they might have been, had never made the brunette feel physically ill; they'd never affected her that much. Even whilst on The X-Factor she had thicker skin than that, so the brown-eyed girl hastily wiped the tears from her face and shook her head, flushing the toilet before standing up and going to brush her teeth.