Sucidal Love

Chapter one

December 1, 2018,

I can no longer deal with this pain. I can no longer pretend to be okay. I can no longer deal with what I do or who I am.
That is why I decided to end my life.
I'm going by the law majority rules. Society made me go this way. I'm so sorry to the few friends I have: Kevin, Kathy, and Jaime and the one boy I would forever love but lost: Ethan.
He left me.
I miss my mother as well. That is why I'm leaving as well. Now Meg, don't take his deal no more fight back and stay strong. Marianna, take Meg and take care of her. You, my sick disgusting father go burn in hell. Don't grieve either.
Please do not be sad for this. I never really mattered anyways. I'm so sorry.
                       Morgan Santos

This. This story of mine, it is not a typical happy ever after ending type of story. No, this is not a cliche romance story either. This is a story about misery and pain and dying.

January 1,2015,

I am Morgan Santos. Fifteen. A middle child. Abused. Depressed.
My mom died when I was eleven. Meg barely born, maybe a year old. Marianna she was sixteen and after hearing about my moms death did she run off with her boyfriend. My father, whom I call by he-no worthy of being called anything -is the one I live with.
Now last year we left Ohio and moved here, to St.Cloud, Michigan. The school I went to was pretty and nice. I made three friends and fell in love... with one boy. And now I stay laying down, looking up at the ceiling of my room thinking of everything I have came to know and what is to become of me.
I slip out of bed and then to my left I see my mirror propped up on the wall with my small little round table next to it. My bed is messy but its pushed against the wall in a long way. I stare intently in the mirror. Than I reach for phone, it reads four thirty. My back faces the mirror and I walk straight ahead. My room is very long and wide. I walk to my window to see the floor outside covered in white. I than turn to my right and open my closet doors I grab a white tank top, long black sleeve, Bad Cop Bad Cop shirt, Lovesick skinny jeans, white socks and dark blue Vans. I walk ahead, my back facing the closet and I go into my bathroom.
I flick the light on and start to undress. Once I'm fully makes I started to get dressed and brush my teeth and hair.  By the time I'm done it's five o'clock. I get startled by how fast time went by. Down stairs I hear him wake up. Terrified, I slip out my room and stealthily go down the hall and tap Megs door. She's already up. I hear her get up quietly. She opens her door and flinched as a reflex but ends up signing with relief when seeing its mea and not him. I pick her up and quietly run to my room. When I shut my door, I hear him bitch about his beer being gone. I look at Meg and put a finger to my lips. She nods. I get up and she follows me. I take her to the closet and she goes to her side. I freeze cause I hear his steps in the stairs I look at Meg and she looks terrified. She is only six though and he beats her. His steps get closer and closer. I lift up a floor piece and she scrambles in it and I tell her Ill be back. She nods and I close the floor piece. He hangs on my door and I walk up to it. I open my door.
"Where's my beer?" He yells at me.
I shrug.
"And your sister" He slurs out.
I shrug again. Even though I know where she is.
He grsbs my hair "Listen you bitch, you better leave by fivefive forth five or I'll beat you and have you walk in the snow. Understan?" He yells at me.
I nod.
"I'm going to the store" he says and leaves.
I sigh and close my door. I hear him grab the keys. He leaves the door. Starts the car. And I see him leave the house. I go into the closet and open up the board. Meg coughs. She gets out and tells me what she wants to wear. I grab her black tee shirt, black and gold lush tutu, black tights, her white jacket and black Vans. I take her into the shower and run a bath. She goes in and I leave and crack the door open.
In my last dresser draw is a bunch on snacks and breakfast food. Not for me but for her. I get a strawberry poptart out and a orange juice box.
I than go and make my bed. I get her backpack and put a cookie and apple juice in her backpack.  When she gets out and is dressed I give her, her food. She eats it and brushes her teeth. She gets her bag ready as I check my phone, it reads five thirty. I unlock my phone and open up mine and Kathy's texts. I text her.
Me: Hey are you up?

Her: always am.

Me: Can you take Meg to your house and take me to school?

Her : on my way

Me: Thanks a ton

I grab my ear buds, charger, backpack and phone and take Meg downstairs. Kathy lives only four houses away so that is a plus. Me and Meg are down stairs now and I hear Kathy honk her horn.
I smile and take Meg outside and she jumps into the back of the car. I go into the front of the car, and took Kathy out. I drive since she's drunk or buzzed a lot or drinking. We drop Meg off and turn to go to school.
We get out the car and head into the double doors to the place I like to call hell.